First Jessica, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. For many reasons your message has hit home with me. I am offering any help possible to help you find some resources to keep your family together. There has to be several advocacy groups in your area in order to get help. Look for private organizations and non-profits in your community. Here are a few that I have found in NY
http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us - office of children and family assistance
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/ - US Dept of Health, Admin for Children and Families
http://www.childrensaidsociety.org/ - Childrens Aid Society
All of these sites have excellent resources for housing, financial help, child care etc. I know that must qualify for several state assistance programs based on your family's apparent eligibility.
Hang in there Jess!