How to make him understand?

suck it up!

I had this problem with a guy friend of mine after we stopped dating.  I reminded him time and time again that I asked him to make an effort to keeping the friendship that he claimed to care about but he never seemed to make a change.  Finally I started telling him how much of a loser it made me feel to always do everything (IMing first, doing all the calling, setting up all the hang-outs) and he seemed like he understood, but still didn't change.

Finally, after freaking out at him enough times about how he doesn't really care he started to act like it a little. So really, all you can do is try to mention it in different ways and be as clear and obvious as you can until he understands the words coming out of your mouth. Don't be crazy about it though, if he feels that you're just gonna whine at him about it he'll rebel and never listen to you.  In the end, he may or may not respond the way you really want him to and you can't change that, but look out for little bits of effort to let you know if he's trying or not.  That's all you can ask for. 

I dont think you can change a man. It isnt healthy to even attempt it. If he isnt providing you with what you want you should find someone that is. Sitting back and hoping he will one day become the man you want him to be is a silly thought. Talk to him, explain what you want and ask him if he honestly thinks he could be that man. Watch his face as he answers and go from there. Goodluck.

well, maybe he's not into talking on the phone, meaning a phone person, i am not, so if he is a phone person, then you start calling him more often then. see how that works, i wish u the best. if he ignores you then u can call me  joking  lol..... 

Hi Carli,

The best advice I can give you is first give him some space and we you do spend time together make it so that you are the only person he wants to call. Men are not very receptive when it comes to conversation sometimes  so you have to be more animated with them, sure it is good to talk things out but mostof the time if it is not about sports,cars,money or sex all they hear is wonk,wonk, wonk..You just have to learn what makes your man tick and work it from there, never tall a man what you need show him.