Why did he come to tell me he ISN'T GAY?
Tthere this man at my work whom is often chatty and friendly to me (I actually am quite attracted to him) and I'm not sure but I think he knows that. Anyway he's the kind of guy that laughs a lot or makes jokes and often comes up to me just to joke or chat about something out of the blue. Anyway the man I mentioned earliar is 37 and he is a tennis coach, we saw him getting ready to play on the court outside and my male friend kept making jokes about the man being gay (but to him more than us, and also it did seem friendly and not bullying) The man didn't seem that amused but I didn't think he was that annoyed either. Anyhow, I was at work today and I asked him somethin Yesterday I had finished my shift and was sitting with my two friends, one male who works in the gym upstairs and a female friend who works on the bar with me. My male friend kept making jokes about the man being gay (but to the man himself it seemed just teasing not mean) and I didn't think the man was that bothered about it, he was getting ready to do his tennis coaching at the time. Anyhow I saw the man today and went to start chatting/joking with him then he started talking about something and he didnt know my male friends name (though I thought he did) and saying what my friend had said to him had upset him, He then went on to say "I'm not gay" and sounded so deadly serious and offended :/ . I told him I knew he wasnt gay! And I was sorry if me or my friend upset him and explained my friend was probably just trying to have a joke with him. I also asked if he wanted me to tell my friend so that my friend could maybe apologise but he told me not to. :s When I apologised and said I felt guilty, he said it was ok and that I shouldnt feel guilty. My question is WHY did he come to tell me this if he didn't want me to even mention it to my friend, my friend was the one making the jokes I just assumed they were friendly and he was taking it in good humour, :/ he's 37 and me and my friends are only 20 and 21 so I dont get why he felt like he had to tell me and in such a serious way.
Love is the battery of life....
Hi, There are many possible reasons for that. There is only one way to know the real reaon is to discuss it with him. If you don't discuss it with him you'll have to rely on speculations / guesses...... Better be smart and sensetive and talk to him..... raise the subject in a nice way, use your wisdom and intuition, ang find the truth. Well, you can also try to see if he is (truely !) sexually atracted to you.... You can a clear answer if he is gay or not by simply finding out who were his partners in the last 20 years...... Best regards,
The Gay Dear Abby
As someone who has "been there, done that" I would say that he was testing you to see what your reaction would be. More than likely, he would have wanted you to say "If you are gay, I wish you would tell me. It would change nothing between us, and you would still be the same person I have always known." Think about it!
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