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Trying to be strong... need help moving on...and sticking to it!!!

The man that was in my life and I pretty much ended things between us over a week ago. (It was never spoken that it was over but there has been no contact at all) We were never together as a couple, we hung out on many occasions and were intimate on and off for a few months, he did tell me before how he felt about me and he knew how I felt about him, but he never acted upon it and things never went anywhere except intimately. I knew him from a few years back, I first saw him and met him at my house, my dad knew him and had him build the deck for my house. He was and is a customer at my dads work, now I also work there, so he calls my job and comes in from time to time also. Things all transpired between us in May of this year, ended a a bit over a week ago.

I have been trying real hard and being really strong, I have NOT called or texted him or made any efforts to see him AT ALL in a week as of today!!! He has made no contact towards me at all either. He calls my work and I answer the phones and I am polite to him and direct his call and all and when I see him at work I just go about my business. Since this all happened I havent seen him around here much at all, but he does call usually 1-3 times a day to talk to one of the sales guys.

I am trying so hard not to think about him and miss him, I have been doing so good not calling or texting him at all, and it is getting a bit better and easier. But then I get a call here at work when Im already thinking about him and I hear his voice and I miss him more. I know that he was no good for me. Things were very messed up but that is such a long story....it can be compared to a rollercoaster. But as much as I knew it wasnt going anywhere and what I wanted to come from all this wasnt going to happen I couldnt help but enjoy the ride, I dont know what it is about him, but I miss him and wish things were better between us. Im really trying to be strong and not fall back into the place I have fallen into so many times, calling him or texting him and looking a fool over him....I know I have to be strong but I know I need help and cant do this alone.....

My question is can someone please tell me anything..advice, tips, anything that can help me get over him and move on and past this or any advice on how to make things right so I can be strong and move on with my life.....???


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Turn off the television and teach your children how to think.

_______________________________________________

*I do not read or write anything in the "Comments" section.*

 

Start by being honest with yourself, Tasha.

This is that same guy you have been posting about. The one you kept insisting you had moved on from; the one you tried to get by playing games and acting to him as though you had moved on even though you hadn't.

You wanted him. You just didn't want to admit it because that gave him the power to use your feelings and allow you to be hurt.

Well, all the game playing and pretending didn't stop that from happening, did it?

I'm sorry you are hurting. It sucks to have feelings for someone and to have them messed with, and I hope the next man you fall for will treat you better.

Meanwhile, the best cure for this is going to be time. And while you wait for that time to pass, try to stay busy with things you enjoy. Develop your own interests and find things to do that give you pleasure.

Allow yourself to feel and to grieve. When you are ready, you will move on - for real, this time. Good luck.
Posted 2009-08-26T15:15:24Z
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I think you should get on the Internet & go to a dating site & start looking for someone other than your ex. If you start looking for someone on the internet, it might keep you from thinking about your ex & you can start thinking about the new guy your looking for. Good Luck & Move On.
Posted 2009-08-27T17:53:57Z
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Open the pod bay doors HAL

Hey Tasha, I'm sorry it didn't work out with this guy and reading your post you covered it all in one sentence;

"I knew it wasnt going anywhere and what I wanted to come from all this wasnt going to happen I couldnt help but enjoy the ride,"

Some people are just great to be with but aren't meant to be a permanent part of our lives and I think that's what you're saying above. When a girl (or a guy) gets hooked on the wrong person it's hard to let go, and what makes it harder is that there's no magic pill you can take to ease this pain. Both JK and Suzy have given you some good advice, but in the end it's just up to you to find a way to be strong enough to get by this. There are lots of guys out there looking for nice girls like you, but as long as you're hung up on this guy you're not giving yourself a chance to meet one.

This worst thing you can do now is sit at home alone mourning your loss so get involved in some other activities and keep busy. The old saying is that time heals all wounds (or in my case time wounds all heels) and there's a lot of truth in that so get on with your life and one day this guy will be a memory.

Send a note anytime you feel the need to chat about something. I don't catch everything but I'll try to see anything coming from you.    
Posted 2009-08-28T13:37:07Z
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Lucky
(deleted account)

Love Your words...... "I knew it wasnt going anywhere and what I wanted to come from all this wasnt going to happen I couldnt help but enjoy the ride,"

Take it from one who knows better....... The Ride Is Over.. So get off and find a new and improved ride.... It will make you feel so much better and will help with the movin on process even if its not the right one it sure does help alot!!
Posted 2009-09-01T01:07:31Z
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UPDATE: I did (I know shame on me...) text him on Friday of last week and said "Have a nice weekend" he never texted me back so I told texted him: "I have something to say to you face to face when you have a chance"...His response was: "NO, I DONT WANT TO SEE YOU" my response was "K.GOT IT." right after that he texted me "HOW MAY I HELP YOU". When he texted me that he didnt want to see me it hit me hard, it was like a punch in the gut, but I think that was just what I needed to see and hear because I was actually going to ask him if he wanted me out of his life for good!!! So over the weekend I went online and blocked his number from my phone and he can no longer text or call me again (not that he would but hey its a good precaution...lol)!!! And I cant text him either...so I wont be tempted to slip and text him!!!

Since then he has called my work once and I was friendly and polite just doing my job and he was in Monday morning in the office where I work to talk to some of the salesguys but I paid him no mind and just went on with my work. It is getting easier because now I know for sure that its over, once someone says they dont want to see u that kinda makes it loud and clear I guess...lol...but I am keeping busy and its getting easier and better...THANK GOD!!!!

Thank you to all of you who posted comments and advice and support, I appreciate it so much!!! Now I know I am gunna be ok....his damn loss!!!! Wink 
Posted 2009-09-01T12:55:49Z
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Lucky
(deleted account)

Well your very welcome and very glad this has helped you.... It's your first step into finding someone that adds to your happiness....  Trust me i was madly in Love with someone i thought really truly loved me and turned out i was just fooling myself in believing that was true.  He was never there for me when i needed him to be.  He could careless about me.  We all get blinded every now and then but when you find that man who treats you good and truly cares for you, i promise you you will definately feel and see a difference... It will make you float on cloud nine..

 I wish you Good Luck in your search., God Bless You,
Posted 2009-09-01T19:09:25Z
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Rated #4 out of 6

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