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Hello, I'm in a 17year marriage and my husband just moved into my daughters old bedroom. She left for college in the spring. Sex has been on a downhill roll for three years sadly it has hit the bottom which means no sex at all. My fear is a divorce but don't know what to do about it. I love my husband but have no desire for sex.


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  • # Posted 7 months ago
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OronD
5773 answers
8552 thumbs up

Love is the battery of life....

Hi,
No offence, please, but you need an urgent marriage counseling.  I bet your relations are deteriorating as well.....
Please don't neglect it, if you do nothing it's a sure way to a divorce. 
Best regards,

Posted 7 months ago ( permalink )
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harryvan
769 answers
591 thumbs up

You desperately need counseling if you want to preserve your marriage. The counselor will probably ask you the following questions which you should have been asking yourself: 

Why don't you have a desire for sex? Don't you honestly think that is the reason your husband does not sleep in your (your's and his) bedroom? Didn't he ever bring up this issue with you? How do you show your live for your husband? How do you expect your marriage to not end up in the divorce court?

Posted 7 months ago ( permalink )
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DB Lady
3827 answers
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Live simply, love generously and  care deeply.

 

Hi,

   OronD and Harrvan are extremely right, gave them 2 thumbs up.

   You  both need to see a marriage counselor if you want to save your marriage.  And also to see a medical doctor to see if there are any medical conditions that cause this lack of desire for sex.  Sex is very important in marriage,  It is just like a plant that had not been watered for a long time.  After the plant gets a lot of water, it starts to perk up again and looks healthy again.  Your marriage is going to die if this problem will not be resolved.

Take care.
Posted 7 months ago ( permalink )
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Thanks Harryvan,

I show my love for my husband when I fix meals, clean house,do laundry,take care of the kids. We talk but never about us. Yes I have ask him if we can go to a marriage councelor. We attend church every Sunday together and wed. but he just recently started going. I don't know why Harry that I have no desire for the man I love that is why I posted this question in hope that someone else might can help. Thanks for you time and Reply.  Sincerely, Kim
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DB Lady
3827 answers
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Live simply, love generously and  care deeply.

 

Hi Kimberly,

    You are torturing your husband by not allowing him to have sexual relations with you.  In turn you are also in a lot of pain.  Why don't you just let him go and let him have a happy life with someone else.  You don't need sex anyway, so just be by yourself.  Then you will have peace of mind.

   A sexless marriage is a miserable marriage or shall I say no marriage at all.

Take care and be fair to your husband.
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Thanks for the reply dogbreeder,

No medical problems. I went to the doctor and he gave me a double dose of hormones. LOL I'm not sure what the problem is but it does seem to be more my worry then his ,could be because he is just one that never will addmit to having a problem. One thing I do know is it is not going to fix its self. We do attend church together and I'm sure he has prayed about it. I know I do all the time. If God could just tell me why or show me why my heart has changed so much. I love my husband and I have been a faithful wife and to tell you the truth I like no sex but I don't want it to turn into a divorce. That I don't want. Love I need Dogbreeder, sex I don't. I have not always been like this in my 30's I don't think I could get enough and didn't. Time is a funny thing it changes people and how people feel about things. Sincerely,  Kim