What did she mean by "she never taught me to value myself?"

She wasn't trying to hurt you.  It sounds like she was admitting her own failure and accepting blame because apparently she thinks that you could have done much better by yourself than you have.

Of course, everything is situational and I wasn't there to hear the tone of her voice or what was said before that remark.  This may be her way of expressing disappointment in you, and if that is the case, you might be hurt or you might feel guilty, depending on how right you thought she was.

Parents do say things that hurt, whether they mean to or not. It wouldn't hurt if it was said by a stranger.  You would just blow off a remark like that by thinking that they knew nothing about you and the choices you have made in your life.

I think that you should ask her for details about how you don't value yourself.  Maybe you are engaging in some behavior that demonstrates low self-esteem and this may be the only words she has to express herself.  If you can calmly find out what she really means and discuss it, maybe the two of you can experience some mutual understanding.  None of us is perfect, moms or their adult kids.  Maybe she has the wrong idea about you, maybe not.  Maybe she really is trying to help and is just bad at parenting.  You've known her for forty years, and vice versa.   If you two have trouble communicating that is probably her fault, but placing blame won't solve the problem.

Hi,
My friend Profitbob gave you an excellent ansewer, smart and sensetive (gave him 2 thums up).  I would like to add 3 comments:
1.  Sometime people make a
     remark without too much
     thinking.  They can say
     something and not even
     remember they said it. 
     That happens specially 
     to older people.   
2.  It can be "translated" a
     bit different: If she taught
     you to value yourself more
     it could be better 4U (and 
     that is not a citisizim).
3.  It might be a way to say:
     "I love you and care about 
     you and I blame myself for
     not doing more 4U".
Best regards,

The two answers you already got are excellent.  But...why in the world have you waited,  with hurt feelings for six months to understand this?  You should be asking her this question!  

I assume that she feels you under-value yourself and she feels at fault.  Maybe she feels that with age comes wisdom and if she had known back when she was raising you what she knows now, she could have given more to you regarding valuing your own self.  However, that is a guess so I believe you should ask her and ask soon.  

My mother died 24 years ago and my father 3 years ago.  I can tell you from personal experience that talking to the people you love needs to happen NOW.  Please don't wait.  You may not have the opportunity later. 

Ask her!!!

  I have to tell you that I read your mom's comment quite differently. I am sure because it is something I wish for my daughter. I have used a very similar phrase when talking to my child as an apology to her for not teaching her to say no or to stand up for herself as she stands up for everyone else...just like her mother.  The whole time we are telling you to be strong, we are raising you through our example to put everyone else's feelings and at times, even welfare ahead of our own. Through counseling, I have had to deal with the reality that my example taught her that everyone is more important than she is and that she has to earn approval from her friends, teachers, etc. by doing all she can to please or by doing things that are important to them with no regard for what she may want. I never spoke these words to her but I showed it to her over and over by my example and so I find myself reminding her and apologizing for not doing better to make her feel as wonderful and valued as I see her.  We want better for you. Please ask her what she was referring to and tell her that what she said hurt your feelings. Unless she is oblivious or mean, which I doubt or you would probably not be as sensitive as you are, she will be kicking herself for making you feel bad.  I don't know if you ever saw the movie, The Joy Luck Club but it is very insightful in this very regard.  Take care and God Bless.