Is my marriage broken?

My wife and I have been married for just 5 years and we have twin boys and a 6 month old daughter. We literally pass like ships in the night as we work opposite schedules and need to do this to make ends meet. I am either working, watching kids, or sleeping. We have zero time together and when we do, we are both flippant and harsh with our words. Our marriage seems broken and I am unsure how to fix it. Currently were are civil to each other, but I see us as little more than roommates who work together to raise our kids. What might my first steps be towards mending our marriage?


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OronD
5021 answers
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Love is the battery of life....

Hi,


It doesn't sounds good.  You have to set time and discuss those matters, it depth, with her.  Tell her you love her, and that you appreciate her efforts to raise the family but you feel that your personal life is not developing in the way it should and in the way you would like.  Tell her you are willing and ready to do all you can and even beyond it to bring your relations back to track, that it is really important to you, and that it really hurts you seeing it the way it is..... Ask her what does she thinks and wants..... I'll suggest you to set a dailly meating with her, send her loving notes, buy her presents, take her out, more frequently,  to reseurant / movie / show.... give her good time, show her your love.  Don't take her for granted.  Take it as a project to re-build your  relations.  It's always harder to build than to destroy !. 
Best regards,
Posted 11 months ago ( permalink )
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Stanson
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Do what you must to get a better paying job. Live on less. Have your wife stay home to raise and enjoy your children. Then you will have quality time for each other.
Posted 11 months ago ( permalink )
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harryvan
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You (you and your wife) must set your priorities. Perhaps you are trying to live above your abilities and should try to live with a little less but with more quality of life. You  do not mention how your children are reacting to this. One of you should assume the homemaking and the other being the breadwinner. As of now you are both totally exhausted with this schedule. You both brought these children into the world and society sees it as your responsibility to raise and support them. Once all this is decided, you must win the heart of your wife. She is certainly also committed to this marriage otherwise she would have let you know in many ways. You have to build on her commitment and give her time to be loved, admired and supported. But above all define your roles and spend this time of your life TOGETHER (including your children). Work at it and with patience and the help of God you will both succeed.
Posted 11 months ago ( permalink )
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relationshipGuru
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A healthy relationship starts with trust and honesty and a big warm genuine smile.
 

You're definitely in a tough situation. While sitting down immediately and talking out your issues is the ideal way to get to the bottom of things, it appears you have not yet made the time to do so. I would suggest setting up a time to sit down and speak to each other, and make it for a time during the weekend, when you are both well-rested. Talking is the key to working things out. Good luck!
Posted 11 months ago ( permalink )
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hello, i know exactly what you mean, been there before. Its hard, i always think you need a little romance and love to get you by. If you both do not have any of these than your relashionship might be a downfall. try to take time out to take her to dinner one on one, be intimate again its very important, you dont want her to find someone else to give her attention. i know how it is i'm a woman. or you can one day send flowers to her work she would love that.....hope this works.....good luck!!!
Posted 8 months ago ( permalink )
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embgals
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I agree as you need to sit down and talk about things and find a happy medium that will work for both of you.  Women need attention and lots of it sometimes.  Show her how much you really love her with simple gestures like maybe cooking one night a week or a great thing to do to spend time together is maybe go to a park where the whole family can be together and have fun.  Try to find ways to help both of you to spend time with eachother!

Marriage is not easy and marriage with kids is even harder sometimes! 

 
Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )