What if your wife of 9 years says that she still loves you, but doesn't think she is still "in love" with you? Feels as if you are are just good friends now?
After years of marriage, love is what is important. Being "in love" does not necessarily last forever, it is the love and caring for one another that lives on through years of marriage. The passion that is there at the beginning is not always meant to last forever. What is meant to last is your love, trust, and friendship. If you want to reignite the passion then find ways to spend romantic time together. Talk to her about how you feel and how you love her and want to bring the passion back into your relationship. Good luck.
To me, you situation sounds somewhat ominous for the relationship. Over the years, I have heard the same story a good number of times, that the s/o is no longer in love, but loves him/her only as a best friend. Personally, I did not necessarily want to marry just my best friend, instead I chose the special person whom I loved in a variety of ways (eg as a person, spiritually, sexually, romantically). Such love is not typically lost in a healthy long-term relationship, although it may well become modified over time.
Is she generally happy in the relationship, and with you as a husband? Are there any warning signs of problems that need to be addressed? I always worry when there is a substantial loss of love in a relationship.
Honey, I have been through what your going through and the reason my ex said that to me is because he was cheating on me. I'm not saying thats the case with your wife but it sounds sooooo familiar. You deserve more in life then living as good friends. After 2 years of divorce I married a man who had been married once before. We have learned to appreciate and never take each other for granted. In turn we have been very happy together. Whichever way you decide to move forward in your life whether it be divorce or trying to work it out I so wish you the best of luck. Sincerely
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You need to have her lay out her thought more clearly. It is not clear when she says she loves you, yet is not "in love with you." Perhaps she thinks that the grass is greener on the other side or is missing something inside of her. I would suggest that you two get to a counselor ASAP.
Good luck.
Aside from all the negative thoughts given here, maybe she is speaking only the truth she just isn't IN Love with you. There are ways to fix that if that is the only problem here. Its gonna take some creativity on your behalf but just think when is the last time you done something really special for her JUST BECAUSE.
Being in love is work it doesn't just come natural
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