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SOPHIA
6 answers
6 thumbs up
Always respect the person you love!!!
Asked about “Love & Sex on AOL Coaches”

My boyfriend of 5yrs. Was unfaithful, i went my ...

My boyfriend of 5yrs. Was unfaithful, i went my own way. I was more then hurt,i stoped total contact.Then we ran in to each other  3mht of not being together. We talked for about 2wks,so we got back together. Before i gave him an answer he promised that he would never do it aging.Should i take his word. Sophia(female,35) ooh i did everything for him. You name it i did for him!!!Undecided

 


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OronD
5000 answers
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Love is the battery of life....

Hi Sophia,


Yes take his word.  Any good relation is based on 4 pillards: Trust + Openess + Communication + Respect.   Discuss that matter with him (trust) tell him you love him, that you want your relation to flourish, that you was hurt last time and you really hesitated B4 you returned to him, and you hope that he is responsible and keep his word.  Emphasize that it is extremely important to you. 
Best regards,  
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SOPHIA
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Always respect the person you love!!!

thank you for your answer. you were very helpful

Wink
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lovedoctor71
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Love knows no bounds.

I do not agree with Oron. I think before you take his word, you need to find out what caused him to be unfaithful. Was it a night of drinking? Or did you guys fight? You need to find out why. There are too many questions you should be asking before you take him back into your life, unless you don't mind getting hurt again. It's possible that it really was a stupid mistake, and he does regret it. But he needs to make it up to you. He needs to understand the depth of your hurt and needs to not just say, but actually prove to you it will never happen again. Relationships are based on trust, and once that trust is lost, it is very hard to earn back. If you are willing to allow him the opportunity to earn that trust back, than take him back. If you do get back together, you may want to try couples counseling as a way of helping you two work on bettering your relationship. Good luck!
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SOPHIA
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Always respect the person you love!!!

so i have not replied to your answer i was having trouble w/my computer. I have asked him way did he hurt me in that way, if i have never gave him a motive to cheat on me. on my part i now and have kept him happy in every way that i new how. there was not a day that he had to clean,cook lift a finger. for special days i would always surprizs  him or on any given day i would do something out of no were. buy him gifts ect. so i just don't understand way. i guess i never will. i don't understand if you love someone and the one person does the imposable for you why would you cheat.

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Wildberry
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Enjoy both your destination and the path taking you there.

Sophia,

Perhaps you did too much.... a relationship is a union of 2 people. Each of you needs to put efforts into making the other happy.

In addition, I can tell you from personal experience, that when a guy works to be with you and it's not for granted that he has you and you do things for him, he gets much more emotionaly involved.

 May I also reccomend a book called "The Rules". Fortunately or unfortunately, it's the honest truth about guys and how to treat them in a relationship. Self tested..:)

http://www.therulesbook.com/rule9.html
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