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What would you do

what would you do if you find out that your female cousin had her way with your husband while he was under a car. and he didnt tell you what happened until three years later and only after you cornered him after a phone call from her. telling you infoe that only you and anyone elas that has ever been with him would know about. now i feel betrayed , hurt and don't trust or believe in anything he says.


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7302 thumbs up

Love is the battery of life....

Hi,
You have 2 options:
1.  To forgive and rebuild the trust
     between you.  That will include:
     open and deep discussions,
     marriage counseling, and above
     all his total and true commitment. 
     It should be clear to him that one
     more tiny slip and it's all over
     (hard and painfull as it can be). 
2.  If you feel you can't forgive and 
     your marriage came to it's end 
     (or not worth fighting for it)
     than get a divorce. 
I always see a divorce as an option only after failing to solve the problem (and trying hard to sove it). 
Best regards,


Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )
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What would I do?!

First of all, I would be devastated,  I would feel betrayed and angry and really really hurt and sad. Honestly, this is a horrible thing to have happened to you, not only you got betrayed, but you got betrayed by 2 people who were supposed to be close to you and protect you. Also the way of finding out about it really sucks and I'm sure you feel like your hole perception of live was shattered and like nothing in life make sense anymore.

W hat I would do is this. First of all, I would do nothing. I would give myself time and space to feel this massive pain and anger and feelings and I would focus on myself and my own emotions rather then on my family. I might even go back to therapy and try to discover how this interact with other events in my life, while exploring and expressing my own feelings toward this, I would try to figure out what I want the next step to be, whether I want to stay in the relationship which means talking to my husband and probably cousin about it and trying to figure out how to rebuilt the trust and make myself feel secure in the relationship. Or if I come to realize I don't want to be in the relationship anymore, I'd hire a great divorce lawyer and get the hell out of there. 


Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )
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702 thumbs up

   " I have my Freedom , but I don't have much time " Wild Horses . The Stones                                                  Protect The Mustang .

                                       

                                                  

                                                              



 
                                                                                                             

You should feel betrayed , hurt and very distrusting of your husband . What did he have to say about hurting you and destroying the trust in your marriage .  I would suggest you seek counseling together if you are going to stay with him .  I would be finding out if that is his only out of the marriage encounter , and I am sorry but it probably is not .  He did not admit this to you , and ask for forgiveness , he got caught , big difference !  Is he sorry for what he did or just sorry he got caught ?


Posted 3 months ago ( permalink )
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