My boyfriend is in Iraq and we have been together ...

Hi.  Well, first I think you need to think about the fact that he is in war.  He must be very scared, even if he doesn't show it.  He is also very worried that he will lose you because you are so far away.  I completely understand his fears.  Not all guys say I love you or I miss you, even though they feel that way.  He definitely sounds like he loves you and wants to there when he comes home.  I suggest, and I wish that you would just continue to encourage him, and not pressure him.  Remember he's got major pressure being in that war.  Let's pray to God that he gets to come home safe and sound.  He needs all the love, support and assurance you can give him.  Please do that and remember just how horrible it must be for him over there.  You make a huge difference in his life, so make it a Positive, Loving Difference.  Our soldiers give their lives so that we can live.  Please reassure him as often as it takes that you will be here when he comes home.  Remember he is in a very vulnerable situation over there, and will tend to be insecure about many things, especially your love for him.  YOU are the one giving him strength to be there.  Please don't disappoint him.  God Bless you both.  Best Wishes.

Hi JadeEternal444,

    What a beautiful advice.  I agree with you 200 percent that her boyfriend  in Iraq loves her but could not help being insecure.  You said everything beautifully.  Thank you.  My advice to her is the same as yours, to give him love and encouragement because I'm sure it is very scary to be there but he and all the soldiers are putting their lives in jeopardy so that we are going to be safe from those terrorists.  God bless those soldiers.  I always pray for them and their safety so they will be able to come home safe to their loved ones.

Dogbreeder

Dearest JadeEternal,

Prove your name that you are worth it..Eternal Jade..to your boy Friend who lives to love you thru calls from most dangerous places.

Realise his limitations and be an emotional strength to his for You Love Him.

You are lucky that he is not in inteeligence or else he would not  have had the luxury to Even Calling you and you wud not hv known his location too.

Remember He Loves You and Needs yr Strenght and support thru yr prayers and assurances that You breath for him,wait for him to come back and hold you in his Arms.

Learn to become His Angel and not a Cause of Pain

Dear Jerseystar 1821,

It sounds like both of you are very young and really didn't get to know each very well before he left for Iraq.  There is no easy answer for you.  If you really love him as you say you do, then you must understand that he is worried and scared on several fronts.  First he is trying to stay alive over there.  I can imagine that he is experiencing some devastating conditions and situations that he may never be able to talk to you about; and then, there's the worry that you may begin to feel that he away too long, and seek comfort elsewhere.  This is common with many military men, especially when they are young, and their relationship is very new.

If you really care, just keep assuring him that you are still waiting for him.  In turn, don't wear him down, by trying to get him to profess his undying love for you with each contact, remember that he is trying to stay alive.  Just be yourself and keep the news upbeat and positive.  The last thing he needs to hear is nothing but negative statements about what is or is not happening at home.  Give him some dreams about what the two of you will do when he comes home.  Give him hope and inspiration to carry him through the really tough times.  And trust in God to do the rest!

RevCherylBrown

my boyfriend is in iraq also right now, and my secret to surviving this distance is being understanding.  i don't doubt he loves you, but he is probably just insecure about your relationship and trying to push you away by saying those things.  if you know military men the way i know them, they're not exactly the greatest at handling emotional situations, so give him time, patience, and support.  This is a time where he needs you more than you need him, so stay strong for his sake.  obviously, you can't force a relationship to work, but best of luck to you both and i hope he comes home safe and sound.  =)