Is a marriage worth saving if you have kids, but ...

Hi,

Here are a couple of e books that may be of some help.

http://confidentlifestyle.com/Documents/enhancelovelife.pdf

http://confidentlifestyle.com/Documents/SaveYourMarriage.pdf

Wishing you the best. 

Love and communication is a choice, if you both sit down and choose to talk and make it work and make it your highest priority, you may just be surprised how those dying embers can come to life.

This all starts with a choice, but that choice and it's intentions need to be communicated.  Go for it and at least you can say you tried your very best.

What about the love, passion, companionship?  You redevelop communication skills.  Don't give up yet!  Seek counseling.  You BOTH have to want the relationship to work.

All marriages have the potential to be worth saving, with or without children.  Communication does have a way of falling by the wayside in most relationships that are not worked at.  There are several things that the couple need to do to establish that a marriage is dead.  You need to know the answer to these questions first.

1.  Who stopped communicating and why?  Have you asked each other this?

2.  Was this a love match on both parties from the beginning?

    a.  If both parties were not equally in love?  Who? and why not?

3.   How long has the non-communication been going on?

4.   Have you spoken to a professional counselor or pastor regarding your situation?

If there are negative answers to any of these questions, before you through away your marriage, FIND SOMEONE that both of you can agree to talk to and seek help. 

The greatest tragedy in life, sometimes, is a marriage that fails because the couple DID NOT TRY to make it work TOGETHER! And if there are children they will suffer greatly. 

Believe me, they will know if their parents have tried everything, have really done their best, to keep the family not only together, but together in love.  And you must communicate to do this!  Both of you!

Simple and easy: If you get divorced, you will have a higher chance of being divorced again. Look up Christian books on marriage if you like. I'm not telling you what to believe, but they give wonderful advice on the last many thousand years of people being married. Not just a modern view, but one with culture and morals. If you get divorce, I do not think remarrying should be an option at all. Nothing against you or anything you did, its just the way I think. Many people are not set up for marriage, and so if they do get married, they should never seporate because they'll just be spreading the idea that seporation is ok. It's not ok. There are a few examples when to divorce: Abuse, Murder, violence, drugs, etc.

Rekindle the love.. find out what made it good. Don't dump someone, especially if there are kids involved.

Worth it for who? Worth in what way?

Studies show that kids to parents who did stay together got better grades in school and did better socially, then ones who's parents got divorced.  However, I don't know what was the impact on living in a home with parents who are pissed off at each other and to a degree resentuf of the children.

It's most obviously worth it financially since divorce cost a lot, you hae to have an maintain 2 houses and so on. Also, it might be worth is socially, some people look badly at people who had a divorce.

I  think that even if you love your kids to death, nothing is worse, from you and them to neglect yourself as a person, if you are unhappy and unsatisfied, you need to figure out what to do to better your life. It might be relearning to love your spouse through marriage consoling, it might be to decide to live a spiritual life that doesn't require sex or love, and it might be to get out of a relationship that doesn't make you happy and start over. 

If You love your Husband Try harder But if the love is lost between the two of you then I would end it Anything you want and love is worth saving.. Me and My Husband Dont really talk all that much.. And we have a child there are times I just want to give up and leave But I love my husband And I just couldn't bring myself to really get up and walk out on my family because people might say they try... But do they really Try????

Hope this helps with you and your husband