I think what you are asking is do you want to exist in the mundane or do you want to truly live!!!  I can't imagine the mundane existance you must endure some days.  You are a young woman who deserves to love deeply and be loved in returned. 

     Passion is important, you need it to remember what it feels like to be truly alive.  If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten, it's just that simple.  Break lose and live agian.