Top 16 Possible Letterman Reactions to Fallout Over Willow Palin Rape 'Joke'

• 16. Listen, I didn't know Willow Palin was 14. She was born in 1995. I thought she was still 13.

 

• 15. Why's everyone so mad? I wasn't making fun of Barack...?
• 14. I understand some offense was taken over my remarks last night. If that's the case, I'd like to offer an apology to A-Rod. Tonight on the show, we have...
• 13. Careful buddy. You're criticizing the guy who almost got the "Tonight Show."
• 12. I'm a comedian and therefore not responsible for anything I say ... ask Jon Stewart.
• 11. See, you all spoiled it. The plan tonight was to come out and tell a similar joke about Barack Obama's daughters. But you can forget it now...
• 10. Hey, did you really expect class from a guy who left his only son a bastard for the first four years of his life?

 

• 9. If you think these sex jokes about 14 year old Willow Palin are bad, just imagine all the creepy stuff in my head that I'm not saying out loud.
• 8. Don't blame me, Contessa Brewer says calling women sluts is back in style!
• 7. Now that Leno's gone I think I can get away with anything.
• 6. Oh come on, last night when I joked about Willow Palin and Elliot Spitzer I didn't mean to imply that Willow is a whore, it only sounded that way.
• 5. Willow, Piper, what's the difference? Turn them upside down....
• 4. Hey Willow, don't be upset, don't you know that when a creepy old man teases you it means he likes you - he really really likes you.
• 3. How can these jokes be perverse if someone as normal as Paul Shaffer is laughing?
• 2. I'm old, I'm miserable and deep down I hate myself, what do you want from me?
• 1. Hey, if Sarah Palin didn't want her children ridiculed in public she should have had them a aborted.