What do when you find out your husband never loved you as much as his exes (2)?

First of all are you sure that you want to raise your child in this enviorment???? As if he sees dad can get by with why cant he be the same way. Now ask your self is living this kind of life what you want or do you want some one who loves and cares about you yes i said you. Take a long hard look at what has happened in the past as you say his 2 exs he loved more than he does you get real young lady there are better men out there all  you have to do is look and dont fall for the first you one meat as you also state of the letter you found from his ex and it stated

He referred to our marriage as "so so" and that he didn't love me as much as her or the "second love". Now dont that erase any doughts you have about your marrage and whats to look forward to thats called him called cheeting then D-I-V-O-R-C-E and thats your olny option in your case.and to quote you My husband has never wanted to communicate.  Trying to "talk" always leads to silence or me walking away because he won't talk. Then you say When he proposed, I asked him outright if he was doing it because he felt obligated or was he truly in love?  He lied....I am careful to not create a difficult situation for my son.  I am not really surprised and have to say, a bit relieved because I have spent a lot of time in counseling and drugs trying to understand "what I did or not do"

Do I tell him I found the letter or find another way to broach the situation that we shouldn't be together. 

My concern is that he mentioned he is "always looking for someone who..." does that not answer your question. Take your child and get out while you still can this is your chance now for you to contact a Divorce Lawyer with what you have now take him for all he has got. Run and dont look back. As this is the only option you have and dont fall for the old sob story i wont let it happen again. LOL

Newbie , Get out of this marriage now . Your Husband's committing Emotional Infidelity at best , if he's not already committed adultery he's well on his way .  You know for a fact from the letter that your husband does not love you . Think about the horrible example this marriage is setting for your son who will be a man someday . Don't teach him to repeat this mistake by raising him in a marriage without love , fidelity , respect and communication . This world is full of good honest loving men there is no reason for you to accept a man who offers anything less .  I wish you and your Son the best .

Yes, marriage is a difficult undertaking. Yes, your husband might not love you as much as his previous loves. But, tell me, how do you measure love? And, what's more before you measure, how do you define it?  Your problem in this relationship is communicatiion. If your husband does not respond you can not find out how he feels. This is the real problem. Without communication no marriage can work. Why don't you ask him how he feels about you. And ad, after you have put the question to him that you will not hold anything in his answer against him. Give him ten minutes - if he is a poor communicator it will take him longer to get going - and then you tell him how you feel about his answer. This would be a start. A small start. After that repeat this as often as feasible. Check out my website.

Hi Newbie. I said something really stupid once too that really upset my Marriage. My Ex husband had passed away, and in an E-mail to my Ex's sister I said to her that I had always loved him. (As if to say I carried a torch for him all those years we were apart). This wasn't true, in my mind I just wanted to relive the good times with him.. but there were so many bad.

My now husband found that E-mail and read so much into it that it nearly costed us our Marriage.

Old flames don't work for a reason. If his first Marriage had been so fantastic and meaningful doesn't it stand to reason that they'd still be together?  Don't read too much into that letter to the Ex. He's just blowing a lot of smoke. He's a dreamer, a malcontent. With 3 Marriages under his belt already, it's pretty obvious he will never be satisfied with anyone. When he's older he will have to settle in with someone who's easy and comfortable, someone to share the bills with, And still, he will always be ready to cheat on her every chance he gets.

I agree with the others. Let this one go. He will always live in a fantasy that no one, not even his first Ex can live up to.