dont feel sorry , ive got 5 yrs. to go and then i can retire. as you mentioned i have a few things to putz around with the make me happy. its just that at this stage of the game - growing up and seeing others and how it went down for them - i feel shafted because its not that way any longer. i know- poor me - b.s - i will make it and enjoy what i have left with my little honey babe. i do feel sorry for the younger people that are coming up . i've been a union offical at work and fought to get changes in work rights and contract wording when i started out - the younger guys now do nothing to change things , they sit and boo ho or better yet blame the old farts ( i'm 1 of 3 left in a crew of 15 ) for the bad deal they have.  i just want to say thanks for the reply - by the way i laugh quite often myself - the wife tells me that i'm nuts. but i dont think so