Scrooge, there is another Yedda member who has a similar problem.
If you go to the 'Explore' link and click on 'People,' then type in her name (Sammy), you should be able to find her questions on this subject and read all of the answers she's been given.
She's received quite a bit of good advice over the last several months. It doesn't seem to have helped her, as yet; but perhaps it may help you. Hopefully, that's because you're ready to listen to the answers now that you find yourself asking the questions.
Good luck!
