I guess I'll be as blunt as possible and describe the whole series of events. It started when my girlfriend decided to further her education. We have been together for 3 years now and in all they have been rather great. The only kicker is that she is taking a class with a female, lesbian teacher. They communicate regularly and I have no problems with her having friends. The problem I have is that I found out her email password after addressing said problems ("I feel insecure because you're spending more time with her than me" - to which the reply was "Don't worry.). Anyways after this little argument I still have my suspicions and looked into her emails. Anyways this teacher of her was talking to her and it seemed to be for more than just friends conversations. I found a love poem from my girlfriend to her about kissing, cuddling whatnot that she had sent to this lady and I also had the ladies reply about resting her head on my girlfriends chest. I went into orbit and yelled at my girlfriend. She proceeded to tell me that I was right but in the whole scheme of things. Right now I don't trust her. Mainly from the fact she lied to me and broke the bonds of trust between us. Though she told her friend that I became suspicious and that they probably shouldn't be friends "right now" that I still feel something is happening or going to happen. I guess I was upset that she didn't tell this lady - "I'm sorry for dragging you into this, I love my boyfriend, he's good to me and all I'm really looking for is a friend, nothing more" and "we can't be friends until I straighten this mess out."
I just don't understand a few things. (1) She was with a man for 8 years that cheated on her so she knows how it feels (2) She still keeps in contact with this woman yet not via email (3) I called her the other day to have her "Ignore" the call.
Oh and for the reasons/signs she's cheating I have this:
1. She likes to dress up more when going to school (understandable) but doesn't really do the same at home
2. We got love rings which were meant to signify our love for each other but when she goes to class (this ladies class) she doesn't wear the ring
3. Her friend still calls even though my girlfriend supposedly said her friend understands that she shouldn't.
4. I offered to take her on a trip (even up to 2 years down the road) and she was kind of vague about it. Though she said she would like to go on a trip with this woman (this was before the email BTW)
5. She is changing her music style to more Hip Hop / Dance based. She used to be a big Audioslave fan and whatnot.
I guess in all I'm scared to lose this woman. She's pretty much perfect and I don't know if this is just depression (stress from school) or that she wants someone else other than me. I would be perfectly fine if she came home and said she didn't want to be with me anymore but this secretive shit is for the birds. I've given her all that she's ever asked for and think that I've put in equal parts into the relationship. I guess I want to know if it's worth fighting to keep her, to kick her to the curb, or to keep an ear and eye out and have life play out?
Am I right ot have my suspicions towards her new found friend?