How do you know....

Dude, you are gay if you have sex with another dude.  Otherwise, you are celibate. 

You aren't 'born' anything.  You may have inclinations about one thing or another but whatever actions you take in life are completely up to you.  Are heroin addicts 'born' that way?   It's somewhat like being left-handed.  You can decide not to be lefthanded.  But we know there is actual wiring for left-handed people and yet there is still no proof that there is a 'gay gene' or anything remotely connected to biology.

You are what you do.  If you molest children, you are a child molester.  If you have ever thought about touching a child inappropriately but you never did it that you AREN'T a child molest.  See the difference?  You can't be entirely in control of the thoughts which enter you head but you are completely in control of where you put your hands or your dong.  If you put them on or in another guy, you're gay.  If you decide that you aren't going to do that anymore then you aren't gay.  There is no such thing a 'lifestyle'.  There is no 'celibate' lifestyle and no 'I only have sex with animals' lifestyle so there is no 'gay' lifestyle.  Using the word lifestyle is just an excuse to do whatever you want and pretend there are no consequences.

Oh, another clue you might be gay....you got HIV from another dude.

You can't choose to be gay or straight.  You may choose to act straight but if that's not what you really are than you just gonna make you and the people around you miserable.

Just as people know that they are straight, you will know if you're gay. If you've been in denial for too long, you may not be able figure out who you really are.

To me the easiest way to figure out is to see if you can feel love and sexual desire for men, women or maybe both. There is no black and white here, you can very well be bi-sexual. Although many gay person hide behind the bi-sexual label, there are real bi-sexuals as well.

You can also try to talk to someone gay. Being around one is NOT going to make you gay but may help you figure out more about yourself...

for some of us it takes years to realize we are gay and we go through straight relationships trying to make them work and causing us and others frustrations.  If you continue to find yourself intrigued by attractions to same sex folks, you are probably gay...so you are doing the right thing to talk about it, open the door to the possibility, and at some point you should know if it feels right for you.  the main thing is don't let others determine what is right for you....only you can know for sure...and for some of us, sexuality is fluid and we are bisexual.  I once thought I was bisexual but then realized that was just the transition in my thinking for assumng I was straight like the majority of folks and like my family would have liked for me to be, but then I realized I was most comfortable with other women....and then I knew what was right for me.  good luck in figuring this out for yourself.

 God has his reasons for everything and everyone has their struggles, we are all here to learn something and if that means you struggle with physical handicaps or are racially disadvantaged in this society or you are sexually attracted to the same sex!  Everbody wasn't meant to live the same type of life as the one we are fed through fairy tales and movies.  The fact that you may have been born straight, your friend will tell you otherwise.  This is not a choice.  Did you choose?  Look no further than the animal kingdom to see that this is a naturally occurring phenomena.  In the ancient times it was considered no less natural than heterossexual sex.  That is before Christendom, in which a great many of the values we hold today were instilled.  There are many of these beliefs that were questioned by the youth of the post war generations and this led to an experiment now understood as the sexual revolution, the last leg to fight on the road to civil rights, which was the crux of this revolution.  Women gained the right to vote, earn equal pay for equal work, choices over what is done to their bodies.  African Americans gained power through numbers, demanding to be treated as first class citezens, like everyone else.  Gays also began to fight back against long withstood oppression. 

Recently fundamentalists in this country have heeded the call for a jihad, a regious war with muslims, who happen to acknowledge Christ but Christians refuse to acknowledge Mohammed.  After the cat was let out of the bag in the 70's with the sexual revolution, people were left questioning everything, including the church.  They view their parents as being lukewarm and only going through the motions of their religions.  Due to the outright changes in attitudes towards sex and other previously considered taboos, people were searching for something to embrace that was traditional.  A new movement gained popularity calling themselves Born again and quickly spread over the country.  With the newly converted presidential canditate Jimmy Carter, people were tired of the sleazy politicians like nixon and could relate to Carter because he too experienced the Born Again experience. 

   Suffice to say that the republican party soon adopted the religion as a part of their political agenda.  Since then there has been many anti-gay legislative proposals seeking to overturn recently abolished antiquated laws and then with help of a commercial celebrity tried to push for new restrictive legislation.  This movement to curtail the freedoms of citizens based on sexual preference, enfalmed the community and with the help of some brave individuals, have continued to fight.  Now another pre-emptive strike to limit gays rights started with a petition to define marriage as being between a man and a woman!  This is a political move to hinder the rights of people.  The only thing it accomplishes is that some one won't be able to see thier loved one before they die, or even they two people care for each other they cannot share their health isurance!  I mean, do you really want to say to Jesus when he asks you what did you do with your life, and one of your accomplishments is to say that you prevented two people who loved each other but were the same sex from seeing each other before they died!  Do you think you will be rewarded? 

I think it is very arrogant that people believe that they know enough about God's intentions to enforce what they think is his desire, I think it cowardly that they pick on an innocent and helpless minority.  They are not prophets!  This is what a prophet is, and today everybody thinks they are a prophet.  Only highly educated scholar, who has dedicated their life to studying this could even speculate upon and still they will admit that they do not know the intentions of God.  The mystery of God will never be revealed.  No these bible skimmers today, do not have the the education or desire to understand these mysteries.  The bible itself isn't the only book of wisdom, in fact it lends it's heritage to a much older text in sumeria which has identical stories of the flood and Adam and eve and even Moses.  These tablets existed before the texts that make up today's bible.  All of these books are sacred and I believe written with divine inspiration, but the words are not easy to understand, they mean different things today.  Like a camel going through the eye of needle, we think of the beast with the hump, but a camel is a rope!