Can you just be friends with a guy you like?

Hi,

It sounds to me like you already told him how you were feeling and what you want, which is for the two of you to be a couple, and he for whatever reason, doesn't want to do that (it doesn't even matter why, don't waste time on it, you could be speculating about that to the end of the world). I can understand wanting him in your life because you love him and not wanting to deal with the heartache of breakup. But I think that by doing so, you'll just prolong the pain and also be emotionally unavailable to the prospects of other relationships.

I don't think you can learn how to not care for someone while being in constant contact with him. I think that many women bring themselves into situations like that hoping that the guy will change their mind or that they could somehow win the guy over. In most cases, that doesn't happened. Just think of how you'd feel once he falls in love with someone else and I think you'll realize that being friends might not be the best idea.

One of my best friend is a guy I used to date pretty seriously, nowadays we are friend but it took 4 years of not talking to one another as  well as working on the friendship for a long time afterwards. My advice - tell him that you can't see him anymore because you want things he can't give you, and move on.

I have to agree with Lilly. It seems you've already said everything you feel to this guy and should just move on. It may take cutting this guy out of your life completely before you can see that this relationship is not going anywhere productive for you. You don't want to put yourself out there, emotionally or physically, and get nothing in return.

I'd suggest making a point of going out with you girlfriends so you can meet other young men and not allow yourself to overthink your previous experiences with this guy.

Good luck!

Dear tc22 Run get as far away from this guy as you can. I think that he is playing games. it's seems to me that when you just wanted a friendship he wanted more, now that he knows how you truly feel he's pulling back do you think maybe you had sex with him too soon. I know all about friendships between men and women or should I say in my case. once you want a commitment they run not all men, but if he is telling you that he was once a player maybe he still is. I don't know if you have time to waste while he makes up his mind whether he wants you for his lady or his friend, If I may give you some advice I would say date other people and no don't continue to have sex with him he has not been honest. listen very well to what he has to say , it does not take long to tell whether people are telling the true. Take care 

How many times you will hear this in your lifetime. Chalk this up as number one, there will be more. I guarantee it. It's hard to let go but if he cares for you at all he will come around. It's nearly impossible to be just friends after you have slept with him but it can be done. Just avoid any physical contact at all. Smile a lot and pretend he is your brother or a cousin and see what. if anything, happens. Give it time girl.