Sending the elderly parents to old folks home is ...

I strongly disagree. My husband and I are in the process of moving my parents into a nursing home. This was a choice that was taken on their part, our part, and other family members after numerous discussions. It was decided that the best care they can receive would be a nursing home that provided 24 hour service, and not living at home. We checked out numerous facilities, and found the one that was most suitable for them. I would feel guilty if something happened to one (or both) of my parents and they were living at home, and there was nobody there to help them if there was an emergency.

Generally, I agree with your statement.  It is unfilial.  The children should sacrifice for their parents when the parents are in need.  Personally, I gave up working and a social life in order to care for mine, rather than letting them go to any kind of facility.  I know other people who have made the same choice.

   Of course, there are special circumstances, like with Alzheimers disease and other medical conditions that a normal adult child without specialized training could deal with, that would override mine or anyone else's rational desire to keep the parents at home.  And undoubtedly there are people who were so bad at parenting that they didn't produce any offspring that cared enough to sacrifice for them in return for the parents sacrifices.  I know people who couldn't care less about their parents, and whose fault could that be?  Sometimes it takes a while, but everybody is their own punishment and their own reward.

I consider nursing homes to be a death sentence on the occupants.  I can't stand to be in them to visit someone, much less condemn someone else to live out their last days in one.  Even the best of them kill their patients with diseases like staph and pneumonia.  The staff is overworked and underpaid, and the living conditions are dirty and smelly.  It is okay if the person has a brain wasting disease and can't recognize their surroundings, but my folks are/were totally aware and I would never allow them to be in a place like that if I could possibly help it.  Other relatives, possibly, but my parents?  That is unthinkable to me.

We are sending them to a private nursing home. My father is 90 and my mother is 86. I want 24 hour 7 day care for them. They deserve it. Only the best after what they did for us , that's the least we can do for them.

I think that though the children may still feel the love for their parents, what about their parents? Do you think that they would have thought that they would end up in an old folks' home? Think about it. When you are old, would you like to be in an old folks' home? People are so busy nowadays, they have absolutely no time to spare a thought for others. They only think about themselves. No offence to anyone, but think twice before putting your parent in an old folks' home.