It sounds like there is a lot of trouble here. First, you need marriage counseling. It's not just a sexual issue. If your husband doesn't want to cuddle, caress, and overall LOVE you, then you're having a much bigger problem than your having "cooties." Personally, I find kissing a smoker absolutely vile - roughly like licking an ashtray, but I don't think that this is your problem. I think the problem runs deeper.

I get that not every husband is always caring and gentle in bed (a little roughness can be nice at times) He should be able to give to you - Sex is about connecting and giving to each other. If it's not working that way in your bedroom, then you need marriage counseling.