She doesn't want to settle down with me.

Maddy you deserve so much better than that.. she is not the one for you ..do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who cannot be loyal to you?.. someone who is not honest?.. someone that does not want to give you their all but rather play head games?.. I have young brothers and one of them was in love with a girl.. the kind you described and it hurt him alot.. he eventually got over her when he realized she was a player and "wanted her cake and eat it too" - so to speak... a person like that does not care about you and how you are feeling and she is playing head games by calling you up wondering what you are doing.. from a female point of view I will tell you what she is doing.. she is going to do what she wants and take it as far as she can because you allow her too.. she knows you are a good person but is keeping you on the shelf so when things go bad for her she can easily pick you on up for the rebound.. the cycle will continue and it is going to change the person you are..what you need to do is just be friends with this woman.. believe me there is someone else far more worthy to be your girlfriend that will honor and respect you... you are young.. this will not be your first girlfriend or your last.. learn from it and move on.. and please do not bring baggage from this relationship into the next.. start fresh and new.. good luck!

p.s.. think about it.. this girl is playing you.. is that what you want?..

I'm just wondering if this is a long distance relationship b/c it seems you don't get to see each other often. Either way, if she's telling you she just wants to be friends, the best thing you can do is to let her go and give her as much time as she needs. She may even come back to you in the end.

yes i agree w both of these somewhat shes scared of commiting let her free and shelll see what a great guy you are and return. she just may be scared or hurt from previous relationships and now that this one has matured inhto marriage longterm shes afraid and instead of loving she needs to run and think.