I always found that fear of torment would motivate my kids to instantly obey: if they disobeyed the rules, they had to go without Vogon Poetry for two weeks. If they obeyed, they could go without as long as they wanted.
Seriously, leadership at home is done best by example. SHow your kids WHY you do as you do, let them make mistakes, but do not tolerate insubrodination. However, put yourself in the child's place! Talk to them on THEIR level but do not sound condescending.
Note Ephesians 6:1-4;
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor your father and your mother: which is the first commandment with promise, that it be well with you and you may live long on the earth. Parents, do not exasperate your children, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord . . .."
You may well beat your children into submission, but what will you do while you are not there?
It is far better to adhere to the principles of leadership than resort to fear. Believe it or not, it is normal for a child to test the limits. Remember that you were a child once, yourself.
So, thinking back, what would YOU want in an ideal parent? That is what to provide your kids.
