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I was dating a guy with a 13 yr. old daughter and ...

I was dating a guy with a 13 yr. old daughter and 15 yr. old son. His son likes me but his daughter has in the last couple of months been very direct in expressing to her father that she doesn't like me. She has acted out and cried and told him she doesn't want me in her life.  She also stated that I had never done anything to make her feel this way.  He recently broke it off to please her. We've dated for almost a year and had planned on getting married. His ex wife gets them every other weekand says she has never said anything negitive about me. I'm really devistated because I love him and wanted him to give her time to grow out of it but he made the decision on his own. What should I do, leave him alone or try to get him back and make the relationship work even though he feels he has to please her and now he's saying that he doesn't want to loose her love? 

 

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2 thumbs up

Discuss it openly with him- he can't lose his daughter's love by dating- she's afraid. Tell him if he give her this power he risks never dating again. Ask him if he wants to work it through together- then go see a family counselor.


Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )
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6625 thumbs up

Love is the battery of life....

Hi,


That's a tough situation.  Obviousely he doesn't want to lose her (probably feels some guilt about the bad time he gave her when he divorced).  You love him and thinks that you could have good life with him.  In between she stands..... and she might be a manipulative person.   The solution  comes down to one question: How much he really loves you.  If he truely and deeply loves you he'll have 2B strong and start to solve it.  The process has to follow that route:
1.  Decide that you start a long tough process and
     you go for it united to the very end. 
2.  Tell her your decision and make it clear that your
     decision is final and no way to change it.
3.  That you are willing to go many extra miles
     to bring your relations (with her) to normal.
4.  That she needs to give her fair share as well.  
However, if he doesn't love you that much (or is not ready to go through all that) better split.....  We need 2 for a Tango......
Best regards,

Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )
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78 thumbs up

I think you need to give it a little time out of respect to him and his daughter.  Don't get me wrong I don't condone what he or his daughter is doing, but you don't want to seem pushy at this point.  If you don't hear from him in a couple of weeks or so, call just to say hi and wish him well.  If he truly intended to marry you he should have put you higher up on his priority list.  You wouldn't want to marry a man who is going to be controlled or manipulated by his daughter, you deserve more.


Posted 6 months ago ( permalink )
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