When raising children (or puppies) you must begin as you mean to go on.
In other words, you screwed up and you are now experiencing the consequences.
However, all is not lost. If she is under 18 and still living at home; you make the rules. It is high time you have a talk with her (during a calm time, not when you're fighting) and tell her that things are going to be different from now on.
Acknowledge to your daughter that you made a mistake by allowing her to grow up thinking that this is acceptable behavior. Advise her that you were wrong and the rules are now going to change.
You must then tell her what the new rules and expectations are (these should be firm, loving and reasonable) and advise her of what the consequences will be should she decide to break the rules.
When she breaks the rules (because she will, just to test you) then you must lay down the consequence and ENFORCE it. To do otherwise will negate everything you are trying to do.
It may take several times (perhaps even months) before things simmer down and your daughter is beginning to show you more respect - but remember, respect is a two-way street. Up to now, you have done nothing but teach her that you were not deserving of any.
Good luck!
