He may have a true addiction to porn, like any other addiction; gambling, alcohol, drugs, etc. and will need to get professional help with this problem.  Having said that, his problem need not be your problem. If you are not married, carefully weigh out what fighting a true addiction for a lifetime will mean to you as a couple. Other posters do not feel that watching porn is a big deal, but in fact, if it makes you feel the way you do, it is a big deal.  Porn is degrading to women and the men that watch it are implying that it's okay to belittle women in this way. Some use watching soft porn as a couple to excite during sexual play, but if he's sneaking around, he's most likely hiding it in shame and it sounds as if it exceeds soft porn.  Let him work on his own issues which will follow him for life. You...be kind to yourself and work on your own strong self and wellbeing.