What should i do if my bf says i love u?

Hi,

It sounds like you chose to be honest rather than deceive your boyfriend, and now have second thoughts because he's hurt.  However, despite having exposed his feelings in a way that left him vulnerable, I think pity love is even more demeaning and humiliating.

It's very hard to tell someone you love them and not get the "I love you too" response, and it's perfectly understandable that he's upset and even hurt. Hopefully he'll manage to understand that this is the way you feel. 

You might not be able to remain boyfriend-girlfriend for much longer though. If he loves you and you don't love him, he probably should go looking for someone else, and so should you. 

Honesty is the best policy even if it hurts because in the long run both parties come out well. You can now decide to have a hiatus or decide to go out with others for a while and at the end see if you and he feel differently. Better to be sure now than to go into something where you don't want to hurt the other one now and then pay for a decision where you didn't place your own well-being first. You are the only one who could do that. Good luck.

Well, you were honest and that's a good thing, however I can also see how your boyfriend would feel at a disadvantage now, and also hurt. It sucks to love someone who doesn't love you back, he's disappointed and sad and there's not much you can do about that (which doesn't involve lying).

I think what you should do now is wait for him to come around and deal with his emotions. It'll also be extra nice from you to be more sensitive to him right now understanding that he's hurt. 

I don't know what he decide to do with this new information, maybe he'll want out of the relationship or maybe he'll learn to except things as they are. I think it's also a good opportunity for you to examine what love means to you and check in with yourself  about where you are emotionally toward this guy.

 If a long amount of time passes and he doesn't come around, I think a session or two at a couple therapist may be a great idea for both of you.

     You did the right thing. You were honest w/ him and that's the most important thing that you could have done. If there's no honesty in a relationship, then there can be no trust either. Without those two things, no relationship can last.

     The only thing that you can do now is hope that he'll come around and appreciate your honesty. If he does, then that's great and i wish you both the best. If he can't handle the truth, then you know that he's not the right guy for you.

     Be proud of yourself for being honest though. It's becoming more and more rare. I hope this answer helps. Take care and God bless.

Telling him I don't feel the same way was not the best thing to say. Your response should have been I don't believe in saying I love you until I know for sure. This doesn't mean that you don't love him it means he is worth it enough to you to figure things out. It would only hurt him even more if he new you said you loved him and didn't know if it was real. If he is still mad at you then you can ask him why he said he loves you, yet when I was honest with you, you got all bent out of shape. Then you can question him and say, love is unconditional and certainly not situational if you love me you will understand and help me to figure out my feelings. If he can't understand your feelings after that then hon it is time to move on, to someone who is not selfish. If you can't come to the conclusion that you do love him then save both you hearts from being broken and break it off, it will only hurt both of you more if you drag yourselves along. 

Hope this helps.