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eric.van1982

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. 

Asked about “Love & Sex on AOL Coaches”

Telling future girlfriend about previous sex life

I love meeting new women. My friends call me a player but I don?t use women. I'm not looking for only sex (although I have slept with a fair share). I go out with a lot of different women because I?m looking to find a serious girlfriend but I absolutely refuse to settle. The truth is though, that I've had more sex partners than I care to remember. Will I have to tell any future girlfriend about all my previous sex partners?


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A man (or woman) who won't die for something is not fit to live.

-Martin Luther King Jr.

I think there there is a comfortable middle.  If you are looking for a serious relationship and you find the right person, you need to be honest with you.  However, the details are a part of your past and you don't need to share them unless you choose to.  Just be yourself when you meet, and when you start to get to know each other, you can explain that you've been with your fair share of women, but that's just because you never exactly found the right one.  You can also say that there are certain sexual relations that you even try to not remember.  I think that she should be understanding.  People change as their lives go on, and unless one does something completely unforgivable, I think that people deserve to be judged for who they are, not for who they were.  Go out and find what you're looking for.  It will all work out.

Smile
Posted 2008-01-10T12:57:25Z
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Love is the battery of life....

Hi,


I have that strange feeling that you don't really want to ask that question (the answer is clear anyhow) but rather advertise your sex atitude, how sucessfull you are with women, and that you had plenty of partners......  I think the English word is Boast.....  A real gentleman will keep it in his safe and never open it to anyone.....  That should be a total / strict private area.....
Best regards,

P.S. - One true love is much better than 1000 short affairs....
Posted 2008-01-10T13:27:03Z
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I don't think that your future girlfriend would like to hear any details about your past sex life. We often like to see new relationships as a new beginning, it would be great if your new partner came out of a plastic bag , but unfortunately  life is a bit more complicated, and good relationships develop between experienced people. You can tell her you have a lot of experience and right now you are all hers. I don't think she will ask for numbers and details , I don't even think you remember... If she will ask a lot more then I would call it seeking trouble , it never makes a partner feel comfortable knowing so many details about former sex life.  Anyways for all our sake be sure to undergo an HIV test .

 

Good day. 

Posted 2008-01-12T18:14:45Z
PamPam was invited by Yedda to answer this question.

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...

Only if you choose to tell them,but...I  don't think that they would like to hear the fact that you've slept with a handful of women.Even if you are not a player by telling them that they might put up this red flag thinking that you are......

Good Luck Laughing
Posted 2009-06-13T00:08:15Z
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I am the owner of http://www.managing-stress.org which helps people who are suffering and dealing with the effects of stress on a daily basis.

I also manage http://www.stopconstantfatigue.org which offers help to those people who are always tired .

I think that some things are better left unsaid. Honesty is always good, but may not get you taken seriously.

There is no problem with playing the field now (safely) and enjoying yourself, because one day you ARE going to settle down and then you don't want to have any regrets or feel that you have missed out on something.
Posted 2009-06-23T08:13:23Z
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always lie.  just tell the girl you've had around 7
Posted 2009-06-29T18:55:48Z
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I dont think that you should have to tell her anything just unless she asks and if she do ask you should tell the truth. If you really like her dont mess it up by lying. Since it is an uncomfortable conversation some people prefer not to have it at all. Honestly, the older i get the morei feel that i dont even wanna go there!!! but i say if she dont ask dont tell...if she do ask dont lie!!!!!(that one of mens biggest mistakes, we can handle a lot more than yall give us credit for). I hope this helps
Posted 2009-07-17T19:45:53Z
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"LEARNING is fundamental!"

God, Country, Self..in that order.

VISION, Change and Education=PROGRESS

This is an old question, but I will answer it anyway...(Give women a little credit.  They are not dumb).  A woman can tell the difference between an experienced male partner and an inexperienced partner in one night (or in a day) whether you talk about it or not.

However, by "not talking about it" you are not comfortable with what you have done (ashamed) and since relationships are about trust, I don't think that would be the right start to a new relationship, do you?

You may want to think about this before dating again.  Speak from the heart, quit judging yourself and face your fears "head on."  It's really not that difficult after you have gotten past the uncomfortable part.

The truth may hurt a bit, but "honesty" is still the best policy.

~ nmpb (aka/pee)
Posted 2009-07-19T14:03:56Z
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Keep mouth shut
Posted 2009-08-04T10:55:43Z
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