Stop thinking when u have sex.  Let loose and go crazy on each other without caring about what the other one thinks.  To open yourself to explore and try out things helps you feel into what u r doing.  Worrying or talking during sex ruins everything.  Drink some wine to loosen the both of you and it will take pressure off the list.  Once you get it done after being tipsy then u will not need the wine to lead the way, trust me, it works.