Sex is a dirty word to my husband.

Thanks for your answer Skitch. He would never do that for me or anything else that I would want. It is psychological is all he would say. He does like porn on the computer. Once I brought up some of the porn and brought it into the bedroom on the lap top. I wasn't mad or anything. I wanted to see his reaction. He went through the roof. Sex is not to even be discussed. i am his future is what he thinks. Like an insurance policy. When he gets older, he thinks that I will be there to wait on him. If he gets ill, that I'll take care of him. When I finish school, that he can quit work and do nothing. Can you see the picture? What he doesn't realize is that he is hurting his future. I am a very patient person and there will come a time soon when I have had enough. Life is too short and if we can't even discuss this subject then there will be some changes. I am in the process of developing a plan. When I leave him I have to be very careful. You just don't know people or what they might do when they feel like they have nothing to lose.You are so right when you said a marriage without sex is like hell on earth. I'd rather be alone than feel alone with him. Thank you for your advice.

OronD, that was some good advice. Thank you. He says he loves me but some dogs get better treatment than I do. You have him pegged when you said that he seemed angry. Yes he is very angry and very negative about everything in life. He is NEVER positive about anything. He was not that way when we were dating. Talk about a turn around. He was definitely acting. And I defintely ask myself the question' Did he ever love me?' I believe, No, he is really incapable of love. He saw a widowed woman who had been married for 20 years, full of love, hope and understanding, who was lonely. I had been married to a wonderful man full of passion for life and loved to please me until the day he died. He is still with me everyday. I do not share that with my husband at all. But it is my way of coping with the lack of love now. I keep my memories and all the great love I use to have. Sounds pretty pathetic. But it is all I know to do right now. Thanks for your advice.

OronD, that was some good advice. Thank you. He says he loves me but some dogs get better treatment than I do. You have him pegged when you said that he seemed angry. Yes he is very angry and very negative about everything in life. He is NEVER positive about anything. He was not that way when we were dating. Talk about a turn around. He was definitely acting. And I defintely ask myself the question' Did he ever love me?' I believe, No, he is really incapable of love. He saw a widowed woman who had been married for 20 years, full of love, hope and understanding, who was lonely. I had been married to a wonderful man full of passion for life and loved to please me until the day he died. He is still with me everyday. I do not share that with my husband at all. But it is my way of coping with the lack of love now. I keep my memories and all the great love I use to have. Sounds pretty pathetic. But it is all I know to do right now. Thanks for your advice.