Scared!

Paula- let me say hi to a long time member.

I will start by saying that I want people to laugh at me because I am a funny guy. And this has no bearing on where you are.

I have no clear but answer here. If you do not receive anything helpful within a few days, then I would get professional help.

JayR 

Hello Paula,

I  know how you feel and I hope I can assist you on this, but the first question I want to ask you is, are you a christian? Before we go any further with this please answer my question and then I will go into more detail about how I can be of fome assistance to you.

Please read over our pages on social phobia (social anxiety disorder).  

In these pages you will find:

--  a definition of social anxiety disorder (social phobia)
--  practical examples of what life is like for people with social phobia, 
--  an invitation to join a free moderated mailing list edited specifically for people with social phobia (social anxiety disorder), 
--  a forum for finding existing and/or planned cognitive-behavioral therapy groups to help you overcome social anxiety.  

Many more CBT groups for social anxiety exist now than a few years ago.  Through the mailing list and these pages, we try to make all of this information available to you.  

The audio therapy series "Overcoming Social Anxiety: Step by Step" is finally available now as well.

Dear Scared....I know this is kind of a backwards letter but bear with me.  I know about this because I have battled with the same feeling you have and have been in therapy and on medication and am living a more normal and happy life.  I have found the above website for you, www.socialphobia.org and it looks like a good one that may get you off to a start, but I definately would look into counseling and medication that may help you lead a more normal life.  You are too young to suffer like that, believe me...I know.  About the cutting feelings, and this is only an educated guess, with many, many years of therapy, 21 to be exact, but, I am not sure if you want to cut or you feel like cutting, or it is just a punishment in your mind for your feeling of self-wothlessness so it manifests on your senses on your body.  Anyway, please get help for a normal life...they know so much more than when I was younger and have many more meds to help!!!!  Good luck and I know you will beat this thing and you won't have anymore FEAR but FUN!!!  ~Peace~  Mary

You seem to be suffering from some kind of anxiety disorder, possible some kind of phobia. Such disorders can be treated by cognitive-behavioural psychotherapy. Usually, the treatment does not require many sessions with the therapist. You should not go on having these troubles when they can be treated.

Read about the treatment of anxiety attacks.

I have Bipolar 1, and I have experiences like that all the time. I could tell that you're insecure. You don't have to worry about what other people think of you because in the end, God's jugement is the only one that matters. The whole world isn't going to be sitting in that chair juging you. You just have to remember that. Keep reminding yourself that each day. What you don't know is that our flaws and imperfections are what makes us beautiful; if we were all the same, no one could tell us apart. Sameness is depressing. Be more expressive. If you tend to be more of an invert, try to express yourself with things other than spoken word. Write, draw, paint, sculpt. It's been my therapy and outlet for more than 3 years. You don't have to know how to paint to make a beautiful picture.  Just pick up a paint brush, and slap it against the paper. I think this is either called abstract or expressionism. You don't even have to think about tequnique just let the creativity come to you. (creativity is the best perk of having bipolar) Just find ways to express yourself. With this kind of art, there are no rules. Just do something different. Suround yourself with positive sayings like the one I wrote in high school. "Everything these days, revoloves around impression; the best and truest impression you can make is being true to yourself." I got that from a poster on my english teacher's wall. "To thine own self be true." William Shakespear. It makes sence if you really think about it. How you see yourself is how other people will see you. I know you can get out of this because if I can, anyone can. If you're afraid to ask for help from people, just talk to God. There is no right or wrong way to pray. Just talk to him as if you were talking to you're best friend. He knows you more than you know yourself, which is the reason why he would be more helpful to you than anyone. Even more so, he doesn't juge you like the people of this world. The best things about talking to God is that he listens. He hears your every thought. There is nothing he doesn't know about you, because he created you. He loves you more than anyone in you're whole family does. He loves you so much he was willing to sacrifice his only son so you would be free of guilt, pain, hoplessness, fear, anxiety, heartbreak and more. He can help you with everything you're going through. You just have to trust in him and have faith that he can help you. I'm going to pray for you but you should do that also. You don't even have to use words. He DOES know your every thought. You can also use that as a way to talk to him too. Just ask him to help you get over this and he will. I've gotten over lots of really difficult situations in my life, and I couldn't have done it without God. I would fall apart without God. I need him like I need my heart. I can't live without him. He's such an important person in my life. No one can take God away from you. People can take your money jewlry and most other things like that but they can't steal your faith. You have to have faith in yourself too. I wish you the best of happiness, peace, and brighter days ahead.  Yes... remember to smile too. You will get through this. I know you will. Keep motivating yourself. Look up motivational sayings, they'll help too.