In answer to Max's question of whether something happened to me at age nine, yes.
I posted this as a comment to Skitch's answer, but so everyone can get a look at it, I'm going to post it out here.
Got popcorn?
It all started on february 13th (That's his birthday)* when I was 9 years old. My sisters and I had always been very close, but they had begun to drift. They became fascinated with computers while I was into other subjects. So I spent most of my time alone watching television, my parents where quite busy, my father worked as a photographer at night, while my mother worked as a teacher in the mornings. So I really only talked to them in the brief time between when school was out and dad hadn't gone to work yet. I was home schooled, Mom and Dad where often asleep or gone, so they just left a note dictating what my sisters and I had to do. So yes I was quite lonely, it was at this point that shadow entered the picture. My Grandmother had always kept dogs, when I was little she had a small mix breed named Angle, I always looked forwards to visits because I would get to play with the dog. But when I turned seven, the dog got hit by a car. I was devastated. My mother found me crying in my room, and took me to the living room to try to find out what the matter was. But I couldn't tell her though the tears. My dad heard the commotion and told me that "Men don't cry they have to be strong". So I stopped crying, I was still sad for months afterwards, but I no longer cried. My grandmother eventually adopted a new dog, Puffy , this one didn't like me much, and was honestly a terror, so I didn't interact with her much. But the neighbors had a dog, A big white German shepherd, that would always, run over into her yard to see me. He would jump up and put his front legs on my shoulders, to knock me over an lick my face. I loved him. this went on until I was about 8, then he stopped coming over, I wondered why, so I asked my grandmother, and she said the dog had died from eating rat poison. I once again fell into a slight depression, but I didn't cry. This is the dog shadow came to be based upon. I was in the car on the way home from the store, feeling pretty down, so I just mad him up, poof, and I felt a lot better. I told my sisters about him, they thought I was joking, and got annoyed when I persisted, so I stopped trying to tell them. The strange thing is he wasn't as prevalent as he is now when I was young. He would really only pop up when I was really lonely, or sad, or angry, about once a day, and little more. But when I was twelve my grandmother had a stroke, her left side was paralyzed, she was in the hospital, for months. We went to visit her every other day. It was horrible seeing my strong proud grandmother, weak and frail, hooked up to a bunch oh machines. To make things worse, I hate hospitals with a passion so that parred with my grandmothers condition, made me feel horrible whenever we had to go. Never the less I enjoyed talking to her, it helped me forget where I was, but when my sisters I was sent to waiting room while the doctors did something, or mom and dad wanted to talk, shadow was all I had. No one really wanted to talked to a twelve year about his sickly grandmother, my family avoided the topic, so I went to shadow. But even then he still mostly followed me to the hospital, and few other places. My grandmother was released from the hospital, and sent home in a wheelchair, unable to take care of herself, my grandfather was a drunk, so he couldn't be counted on to do it alone. So my already busy mother, and my aunt, took to the task of taking care of her. The took turns my family and I going every other day, to make sure she was in good health. It was mostly my job to look after puffy, who eventually grew to like me. Shadow aways went with me when I took her for a walk. My grandmother street was a quite one, so I could talk to him out-loud with out fear being mocked for it. After a while, I feel into a routine, got used to the fact that my grandmother was sick, that it was our job to look after her. I began to regain a sense of happiness. This went on for about two years, the routine became more of a lifestyle, shadow still there, when I needed him. But then about a month before my 13th birthday, my grandmother had a brain aneurysm. She was back in the hospital, the doctors telling us she wouldn't get better this time. We were devastated, my mother was crying all week, and for the fist time in a long time so was I. I would lock my self in the bathroom, and sit against the sink, shadow by my side, and cry, I didn't want anyone to see me cry because I had been trained not to. My grandmother was in a coma for about a week, they let me see her, her eyes were rolled back in her head and her eyelids would occasionally flutter. I thought nothing in the world from that point on would look worse to me then that image, of my strong proud grandmother, laying there, almost dead I was wrong. After those to weeks passed, she finally let go, I found out when my uncle stormed into the house asked for my mother and said "She's gone" my mother bust into tears and hugged him. A few days later they where planing the funeral, it was summer so my mother was on summer break. we went to the funeral home and mom asked my sisters if we wanted to see the body, we declined, and waited the lobby while the rest of my family viewed her body. Shadow was with me, holding back tears, he asked my why I didn't want to see the body, and I said that I wanted to remember her how she was when she was alive. He was silent for a while after that. But he was there, by my side the whole way. Two days after the viewing I was asleep in bed, dreaming that I was in the park, shadow was there, he often pops up in my dreams. But then mom woke me up, her face, I will always remembered how she looked, beaten, sad, her eyes puffy, from crying. It was the day of the funeral, you'll never no how much I wanted to just go back to sleep just then, and stay dreaming so I wouldn't have to face this day. But there was nothing for it. I put on my suit, slipped on my shoes, and we drove to the graveyard. Shadow can change his size so he rode in the pouch on the back of the drivers seat, telling me to stay strong. And I did, I was dry eyed, on the whole ride there, till we entered the service, and I learned it was an open casket funereal. There she was in her Sunday best just laying there in her coffin, the skin on her face was pulled taunt from rigamortis, deathly pale. It was like, that was just her body everything that had made her her had gone somewhere else, leaving the shell in-front of me. I held it in until I got to my seat. The pew the rest of my family was sitting on was full so I had to sit somewhere else. I was glad for that. I didn't want them to see me break down. So I sat down, shadow laying across my feet, and cried. I never heard a word the pastor said, I was in my own little world of misery, each memory of her was like a blow to the chest. After the service While I was walking out of the church, my eyes red, shadow trying to cheer me up. One of my cousins walked up, with out a word and gave me a hug, a real hug, I can't tell her how much I appreciated that. We drove to my grandmothers house, which I now had to get used to calling my grandfathers house, we had dinner, and we went home. Having shadow around helped immensely. But it was still shocking how fast life moved on after that, I still had chores, I still had responsibilities, none of that would wait till I stopped grieving. There was no one to talk to about he way I felt, it was an awkward subject , still raw in our minds. So the only person I could talk to was shadow. It was at this point he became a constant, always there, always giving advice, right my by side. There was tension in the house, Mom and Dad argued constantly, and I became more reserved. I read constantly, shadow with his head in my lap. Reading I think was a bit of an escape, from the world. It's basically stayed this way until, now, I have a house now, shadow laying on the floor even now. My parents still fight, and my sisters are still very close to me.
