Thanks guys for all your suggestions .
I completely understand your mature point of view Mr. Leed Tex, regarding the cultural differences about the concept of "institution of marriage" between the eastern and western cultures. Arranged marriages are very much prevalent in here, however, there has been a tremendous change in terms of how "WE-THE PEOPLE" here have started looking at it with a different perspective altogether. From what I know of the western world, I can clearly draw a comparasion and explain you a bit more precisely. In contrast to live-in-relationships and love marriages prevalent in your culture, WE (though not all) are sort of towards the "arranged marriage" concept wherein we are educated and broad-minded enough to let our child take a major decision of his life, however, all that we simultaneously appreciate is that the child should take this step with the concent of his/her parents. What I want to stress upon through this (in context to our conversation) is just that my son has not been forced by me or by anyone else (in my notice) to proceed with marriage.
Now regarding the questions that have been asked, my son is 29 and my daughter in law is 25. The courtship period (between the engagement and marriage) lasted for about 2 months wherein there was absolutely no physical intimacy. In response to what Njoy has quoted, yes, I absolutely agree that I shouldn't be aware of these personal details of my son's relationship, however, don't you'all think that any girl going through what my daughter-in-law is, would find someone to confide in?? Atleast her parents?? ...and thats what she did. Thats how I managed to get the details from i.e through her parents. We all elders now feel responsible enough to get a solution for whats been happening since quite some time now. Goes without saying that my son is not doing this intentionally...there is some "sheer helplessness" that is making him behave a bit stubbornly regarding the whole matter.
I, as a parent, am completely free of any conscious guilt of forcing my son into anything. Yes, it bothers me (like any other parent) if he does anything wrong, but again, I leave it onto him and destiny to decide whats good and whats not. I might sound a bit protective and traditionalist about my way of tackling issues, however, I believe this shouldn't be the main matter of concern as of now 'coz every individual is different and henceforth, difference of opinions have to come in (always a welcome though).
Coming back to the matter of concern, I just want to know the possible reasons behind why my son does not feel the need of confiding in anybody? I guess you all would agree that he's himself aware of what he is suffering from (any of : psychological stress, homosexuality, impotence, erectile dysfunction, etc.). If at all he's not finding anyone trustworthy enough to confide in, then why isn't he finding out a solution for himself? In my notice, all of the above mentioned problems have treatments that my son is educated and aware enough to resolve, except for homosexuality. Now, if the latter is a possibility, that the biggest question in my mind is Why did he get into a big responsibility of getting married? Clearly, he shouldn't have dug a well for himself by doing so. He could have stayed single all his life without even feeling it necessary enough to confide in anyone.
Friends, this is all what I wanted to convey and share with you'all. Just wanted to make myself aware of all the possibilities that could be prevalent and whether or not a treatment for them exists. Please speak your mind out and feel free to give me all possible suggestions that I need to consider/work upon.
Thanks a ton for taking out your important time.
