Your Opinions on this Lost Love

ok, to start off, my girlfriend and I have been dating for about 6 [and 1/2] months and we finally broke up. I fell in love with her the first time i saw her [literally]. But the problem was she didnt love me back. Hence, i spent countless hours and won her heart. She loved me [as far as i can tell]. the first five months were splended. But in that five months, i realized that she was quite immature [she was actually rather younger than me...]. But i loved her way to much to let her imatureity affect our relationship. And it wasnt like she was retarded either... But after the 6th month, she stopped spending time with me. She would hang around with her friends all the time. I mean, she I'm cool if she hangs around with her friends some of the time... but she completely stopped speding time with me. But she talked to me normally and hugged me and all of the other bf and gf shit. i started hinting her that i needed a little more attention. I'm pretty sure she figured it out. But never the less, she kept on ignoring me. In the early months of our relationship, she used to be attached to me quite tight. But now, all of a sudden, i became invisible to her.

 I kinda got that hint that she wasnt interested in me anymore. And i thought the best thing i can do to make her happy was to let her go. And i did. I broke up with her the nicest way i could. I told her that we should go our seperate ways. I also told her that she's a beautiful girl and she would have no trouble finding another indavidual who would love her to death. 

I start moving on and flirt with other girls. But then again she calls me, crying on the phone, saying she wants to get back with me. Normally i would say "no"  but i really really love her and cant live when there's tears in her eyes. 

 But nothing changed. Even though we were boyfriend and girlfriends, she still kept on ignoring me. she would spend a shitload of time with her friends and 0seconds with me. I thought this time, i'd just try to talk to her about it. She nodded. And at the end of the week in which her and i got back together, she said she wants to break up with me. 

I hugged her and said goodbye. I'm pretty sure she got back with me the second time only to break my heart. But i didnt bring it up to her. I just wanted her to be happy. If she becomes happy from my broken heart, then so be it. 

But now, she wants to be "friends". Thats rather hard for me to accpet. I stopped talking to her. And one day she even asks me "do you like hate me or something..?". I said "no". I dont hate her. But i dont think if she loved me in the first place, she'd break my heart and play with me. 

 Do you all think i made the right decisions? Is there something else i shoudl've done to make the relationship last longer? Is all of this shit my fault? 

 

P.S. - I tried my best to treat her really well. I bought her flowers [the reddest of all red roses....]. I Wrote sweet love notes and dropped them in her locker.  I bought her stuffed animals. I gave her all sorts of things to let her know how much she means to me. 


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532 thumbs up

You are correct; she is immature. A child often does things without recognizing that there sre consequences. Continuing this would just end in pain for you  and of her lack of understanding for the pain she causes you. You made maximum effort, you tried so now is the moment when you should drop out of this game and look for someone more mature. Close the door and don't look back even if she calls you; get on with your life. You have good character that someone fortunate will appreciate.


Posted 3 months ago ( permalink )
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13 thumbs up

u sound like a really nice guy and the only thing u did wrong was chooseing the gurl to fall in love with cause i know this type of gurl cause i used to be like her i'm going to be straight with u this gurl only dated u cause u were older and her friends thought it was kool, and she cares what her friends think about her. when u broke up with her it made her look bad so she thought if she hooked back up with u then dump you would make her so popular with her friends, but watch one day she going to realize that u were a great guy and she missed her chance

p.s just because this gurl broke ur doesn't mean every gurl will so keep ur heart open and you'll find the gurl that will make u happy


Posted 3 months ago ( permalink )
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3504 thumbs up

Live simply, love generously and  care deeply.

 

I agree with both.  She is very immature.  You did your best for her.  Now the next thing to do is to move on and get someone close to your age so you'll have a lot more things in common.  It is better to stay away from her.  it's not easy to maintain a friendship after a break up.  That creates more problems later.

Best wishes.


Posted 3 months ago ( permalink )
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J
1 thumb up

I think you have handled things in an exemplary manner. She is immature as you know and if she does grow up she will realise what she lost. In the meantime all you can do is let go and do your thing with a clear conscience.I know you love her but until she grows up of her own accord there is nothing else you can do. Good luck in finding someone else.You sound like a really nice guy who deserves it!


Posted 3 months ago ( permalink )
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J was invited by Yedda to answer this question.

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