I am not sure how to answer this. I have been married before and am in the process of divorcing at this time. The man I am divorcing now is asking to return. This answer is going to sound shallow on my part but I am going to be truthful. The name of the man I am divorcing, is Brian. Brian and I argued continually and the stress was on all the time. That is the main reason I asked him to leave. The arguing and stress related to the way he dissaplined my children (they aren't his biological). He was a good man other than that. He continually calls asking to return. I give it some thought now and then but to be honestly truthful he was LOUSY IN BED IN THE SEX DEPT. He liked to have sex (great, I love it also). He liked it often (I do also) BUT he only liked it in one regular fashion, no foreplay and over and done with, basically. He would "attempt" a few things that I asked him to try, but it was always a half-attempt and did nothing, if you get what I mean. So now when he asks to come back, even though I THINK about letting him return and about us working on the problem with the way he disapplines the children--I have given up on the way his half butt attempts at sex, leave me cold. The only thing I can suggest, is to be honest and forthright and tell him that you need more sexual stimulation. Don't tell him he is at fault or even that he isn't doing something. Don't put anything NEGATIVE in the line of having anything to do as being because of him doing or not doing something. Men are very sensitive to sexual critizism. Just bring it up in a fashion that you read a book about sexual things and would like him to try different thing out for you as you need some stimulation like most women do to have orgasms. Good Luck my dear as this could depend on whether your relationship will last or not.