We have a grown daughter that is an alcoholic. The doctors have told her she MUST give up drinking now or die. Being a control freak she insists she can do it by herself, but of course she can't, (she has tried many times). I have reaserched where and how she can get the help she needs, but here is the snag she uses not to do this. Can anyone help with a solution.
She has six cats ranging in age from 12yrs to 2yrs. She says she will not give up her cats. (She needs inhouse rehab to quit this 30yr. addition.) She has no job and no money. Does anyone know of any organization that will keep cats, while a person is in rehab, for a small fee and food and litter and then let the person have them back when they are cured?
Any help or suggestions on this problem would be greatly appreiated.
Thank you.
Through all the difficulties I had in my Life I had JESUS by my side. Each time JESUS pulled me through. You need to trust JESUS CHRIST, have faith in him, and let him do the work for you. It might not be over night. You just have to wait. JESUS has helped me the last 3 years keep straight. My ex-in-law lied to the courts and my family about me, so I could not see my grandchildren. However, my oldest granddaughter will be 16 in 3 years and when she is 16; I know she will come find us. She loved spending the night with us and she was old enough to know what was going on.
So my advice to all; Ask Jesus to take care of your problems because that is what he is for (he does it better too!). Then give JESUS time no matter how long it will take! Because, if you take care of it you will mess it up; you will have to start over from the start or not at all because it is so messed up you are out of luck completely.
I had a similar problem, however my child was on drugs and alcoholic. Though he was living with his wife I really could not do much but I still tried convincing him what he should do. You do have an advantage. Your daughter lives with you. Since she lives in your home she has to obey by your rules. She did it her way already and look where she landed. No job and free loading on you. She has to be supervised 24/7. This is going to be a hard road for you and your husband. If you do not have a husband I would not do this alone. Call a mental clinic or AA and see what they can suggest. There are government programs available for low income families.
Do not let her handle it by herself. My ex daughter in-law told me that she was taking care of my baby and he died 3 months later. That's way all the bad info came out on both of them. I am saying today "why didn't I do this? or that? he would be alive if". He was my only child and I raised him myself. when I talked to him he had lied to me and it really wasn't him I was talking to it was the booze and the drugs. My baby! Call a mental clinic or AA and see what they can suggest.
Since she is 30 maybe another option is next time she gets druck call the police and have her arrested. It will not be easy for you to do but it might be a way to get her in a clinic without you paying for it. When my son was hurt on his job (that's what started the drugs) my husband and I supported him and his family for almost 2 years. Ex's family did not help the kids at all. Made up really broke. It's going on 6 years and we are still recovering. We had to paying for my son's funeral and burial and it ain't cheap. Another thing before you do anything check into it for your own safety. Your state laws might be different than my. You are in my prayers.
I would suggest that you facebook, myspace, chain e-mail those around you and find foster homes for those cats while your daughter recovers. Six cats are alot but maybe some would be willing to take 2? Also, call your Humane Society and ask them if they have a list of foster homes or if they would be willing to let you post notices in thier building asking for foster homes. To be truthful, your daughter will probably come up with more excuses after you arrange all of this, and it seems like she is old enough to be difficult about rehab if she wants to be. Depending on the circumstances (arrests, previous rehab, is she harmful to herself, to others, what state you reside in, etc), you may be able to have her go to rehab involuntarily BUT THAT DEPENDS ON YOUR SITUATION and you would need to speak to a lawyer. BUT be aware that that kind of action breeds a huge amount of resentment that she may never be able to let go of afterwards. It's a difficult situation any way you look at it, but you have several options.
Thank you for your speedy answer. I am married but unfortunately for the last 1 1/2 yrs my husband has not been feeling well and doctors can not find out why. Because of his health making him feel poorly everyday his mild depression has turned into major depression. Our daughter does not live with us. She just lost her job a couple weeks ago. We paid her July rent. My husband's doctors have told him he should not get upset over grown childrens problems.(She has drank for 30yrs--she is 50 now). Her unemployed alcholic boyfriend just left her last week. Natually no parent wants to see their child die so we are trying to get her to go to rehab. I am also very depressed and tired between my husbands problems and hers. In our area police don't arrest people for being drunk as long as they aren't causing any trouble. Again, thank you for answering--it makes me realize that time is of the essence and I have to try to find some kind of a solution quickly. I am sorry, very sorry, for the way your situation ended with your son.
I do not know any agencies that will provide the service you need, but there are people who do so in home cat sitting for a very nominal fee. You might want to check with your local vets to see if they know any low cost cat sitters. I would also find where the nearest AA meetings are and ask around if anyone knows or is interested in performing such a service. A note of caution: Remember you are letting a stranger into the home. Should you be successful. take care and get at least verbal references and make sure they live where they say and that their phone number is not a "phoney". You can also check with the voluntary shelters to see if they are aware of some one who helps out. Rember cats can live on dried food from dispensers and kitty letter, although not ideal does not have to cleaned every day so that a few feeders , some big bowls of water and say 3 litter pans could make it possible for the care giver to visit one time every three days. Remind you daughter that if she should die from her alcoholism what would the fate of the cats be? Lastly, I would contact the local TV and Radio stations and newspapesr. Many of them have a help line and I would see if they could provide me with an agency that provides the kind of elp that you are looking for. A last thought would be to post your need for low cost cat sitter- 1 time every three days at the mall, supermarket, or house of worship. Do not be suprised that if you are able to overcome this obstacle that she finds another reason to sabotage treatment. I wish you luck. But again I caution you about allowing a stranger into the home. At minimum remove all the valuable and sellable items. I just did a google.com search and came up with several hits. Also try yahoo.com. and Craigslist. Good luck!. Sincerely,
Ralalt
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