Hi Bill,
The way people would respond to your situation is going to change because of the new information you just added. I think I will be brutally honest here. In that case, she does not need to see any Gynecologist. She loves somebody else, I'm sorry to say that. She just can't tell you that's the reason why she does not want to have sex with you. Generally, we women love to make love with the man we love and care about, (except for those women for hire), I understand how she feels. It's not easy to pretend to enjoy lovemaking if a woman is thinking about someone else. I don't know how men are.
Bill, you are in a very tough situation, you want to keep your vow to be with your wife forever, but the problem is she does not share the same feeling. That makes life difficult and unbearable, difficult to accept too. You gave her all your love and caring but her mind is somewhere else.
I do think that God is a good God, He understands everything that is happening between the 2 of you. I think He will understand if you will let her go where she will be happy. She is like a beautiful bird that you really love but that bird is going to be happier when it is out of your house and being able to enjoy whatever is there to enjoy. Why don't you let her go and give her the freedom that she wants? The reason why she married you was not a good reason, it's because you are a nice man. And then, she met another nice man, perhaps nicer than you, so she wants to be with this person.
Bill, you are only 47 years old, you don't need to waste your life on someone who does not appreciate you as a husband. You deserve better. Sex is NOT the most important part of marriage life but is ONE of the most important aspects. It gives couples a sense of closeness, sense of belonging, uplifts, knowing that there is one person who is going to be by your side through thick and thin, and through trials. But if you are in a relationship wherein there is none of the above mentioned, life is empty and meaningless. Everyone wants to be cared about, given importance, and appreciated. If you are not getting this from the woman you married, then it's time to let go, move on and find a woman who is going to reciprocate your affection, caring and attention. You need to have a quality of life, not just living day to day, wondering when your wife will sprinkle you with a love that is divided.
I think you need to really sit down with her and have an honest discussion of both your plans for the future. , if you are included in her plans. She needs to answer you honestly what she really wants to do for her to be happier in life. Perhaps her happiness lies in that other man. How can you deprive her of her happiness? I think that you will be relieved after you'll have an honest and open discussion just the 2 of you. Your decision will depend on her honest answer. Whatever it is, accept it gladly. You will be relieved of this uncertainty.
Bill, life is not a bed of roses. God has His way of testing us. It's up to you to do what is good for yourself and also for her.
God Bless you Bill. I know that there are a lot of men who are in the same situation as you are in. I hope your mind will be enlightened so you will do what is right. There are a lot of Christians in this website who will include you in their prayers. I know they will. I will certainly keep you in my prayers. Prayers do a lot of wonders which our human mind can't even fathom.
Rina