Mom and her commentes

Hi, sounds to me like you and your mom are having a typical jousting of words between mothers and daughters.  If it's not clothing issues, it's hair issues and then boy issues. 

These are tense times in a household for both women.  Patience is needed on both sides.  You can be the more mature acting person if you want to be. 

Try to go through your closests together and talk about what you think looks good and listen....I said....LISTEN..to what your Mom has to say.  If she is calm and mature acting, tell her why you do not agree with her.

 Perhaps the two of you can come to a comprimise on this very common problem.  You two really are "sweating the small stuff"  Life is so much more than arguing over how we dress. 

 Patience with each other, and holding your tongue once in a while (both of you) will help you get along better.  Good Luck, NJoy

You are absolutely correct voterperson, when you say you do not have to ask your mom what you should and should not wear.  Good for you!  That's the spirit!  When I wrote that "advice" I thought I was advising a teenager.  I had no idea that you were a grown up.  I learned later, thru reading more of your posts that you are an adult, a middle-aged ADULT for goodness sake.  And I learned that your Mom is in her 80s!!!    That puts a different slant on everything.  All you need to do is ignore your mom's words.  Stop responding to her comments as if you were a child.  Just stop.  You can do that much for your own self-esteem, it seems to me.  Don't respond in any way. Just go about your business and smile. Treat your Mom like the infant she has become.  Good Luck.  You need a lot of it, but you alone will have to change.  NJoy

You are welcome.  I hope things improve in your household.  ps: the outfits you described sounded beautiful to me.NJoy

You  are  a  54 year old  woman , Who  is  arguing with  a  83 year old  mother,  I  wish  I had  my mother , She died  at  age 58 years old , You need to really   ignore  what she says   And you  sound  like some  teenager  who argues  with  their  mother,  You know  you  could  throw  your mother  into a massive -heart  attack  just  cause  of you  contribution  to  arguing  with  her , You  need  to  learn  to  ignore  , Or  get up  and take  a walk  out of  the  house  And get  some  coffee with a  friend

Hi Undertaker.  If you will read the posts above your own, you will see that I also thought this voterperson was a teen ager when I first ran across her 5 months ago. When I found out that she is in her 50s and her mother in her 80s and tried to tell her the things you are telling her, it fell on deaf ears, because she just kept on posting the same old thing.  She is beyond our help.  Don't waste your breath and your thoughts on this one.  Thank God I've never know anyone this immature unless they were mentally hadicapped.

My dear lady you are still hung up on your mother. You still care too much about what she says day by day. You must learn to tune her comments out. I'm sorry but she is not going to always like what you wear.   More than that she is not going to be in a good moood every day. She won't feel good every day. She will hurt with arthritis or some other thing that will cause her to be sharp and speak sharply at you day be day. You don't seem to understand these things. I also told you once that she is quite old and won't have the same taste as you being younger.  Now think about these statements and tells me why you should expect any woman in her eighties to lilke what you wear and to sweet and kind and to compliment you every day or almost every day.

On the flip side, why should she be so nice when you seem to be real good at screaming at her and being mad. You don't have the excuse of being senile or in the eighties or all those other things I said about her. You really need to mature and be more understanding and less angry and less needful of mothers building you up all the time . You are suppose to be raised by now--or long time ago. It is time to get over mom's comments--period. If you don't, these fights will go on until you put her six feet under and then you  will feel most sorry.

Change now could create real happiness for the two of you. I don't see a eighty- some year old lady changing--you will have to be the hero here. Have you got it in you to  give the two of you a few good happy years? I pray it may be so.