Marry him or Move to Paris?

NEVER give up your chance at a once-in-a-lifetime experience for a man (or woman).

Any partner who would insist that you do so is not worth having.

I don't mean that he shouldn't express his desire for you to stay close, but the bottom line in loving someone is this: If you truly love that person, then you want them to be happy - even if their happiness comes at your expense.

If studying in Paris would make you happy, then that's what this man should want for you; even if it would mean that he never saw you again.

If he can't bring himself to wish that for you, then he's not the one for you.

Good luck.

P.S. Here's a tip: When you are faced with a decision like this, ALWAYS do what feels right to you; but ONLY if you make the decision wholeheartedly.

If you do decide to forego Paris in order to stay with this man, but you truly wanted to choose Paris; your decision WILL come back to haunt you and you will end up with problems in your relationship somewhere down the road.

Paris is nice for a vacation - but European cities are NOT like cities in the States.

They can become extremely cramped, people live mostly in apartments with the the very rare exception living in a Villa.

I have lived and worked in Europe for 6 years now (Germany, Spain, and now Italy) and the feeling of living in Europe is Completely different to the feeling of living in the "Colonial" countries like the States, South Africa (although changed a lot now with the crime) , Australia, Canada, New Zealand etc.

In these English speaking countries there is always a sense of possibility, finding new ways to do things, changing, not accepting .... but in Europe, it's totally different. It's a very established continent, there's certainly no such thing as the "American dream",

those who have money do, those who don't don't, those who have all the property do those who don't don't, those who have that business contract do, those who don't don't - - and that's the way it stays.

The point that I'm trying to make is that there are many pretty European cities but take a long hard think before you decide to make a fairy tale out of them. The biggest factor in anyone's life wherever they live - is Quality of Life. Is your quality of life going to be better in Paris than in the States.

Losing close friends, losing the system (you may not realise but you know a system of doing Civil related things - registering you dog, where to pay a traffic fine, where to register for voting etc. etc.  --- you lose thi system in a European city), living in smaller spaces, less green open spaces, smaller streets, losing friendly familiar faces etc. etc.

Think long and hard about this - Europe is Fantastic for a holiday, but to live it is a total 180.

All the best.

Hello conflicted. 

 My first thought is:  True love will survive anything. 

The fellow you describe sounds amazing, HOWEVER, if he stops loving you because you are following a dream you've had for a long time, then he is NOT so amazing. 

True love can withstand anything we throw into the mix.  Do what you want to do and any man who doesn't celebrate your choice with you is not the man for you. 

In the book, "Women Who Run With Wolves" many years ago I read a sentence that has stayed with me. 

It went something like this:  Imagine a circle of men watching you.  Act your silliest and the man who is smiling at the end... that's the one for you. 

Your boyfriend's attitude seems to me to be "frowning" at your dream.  njoy

It really depends on the understanding of love that you each have. The love of a friend will support you in what you want to do, if they feel it's healthy, and positive for you. They also love you if things don't work out. A lover will be more selfish, and hold on to you. much the same as a drowning person will grab you. If you are friends first, talk it over. What you want will make itself known; and then, you need to follow through. No regrets.

I don´t see you saying anywhere that you have spoken about this with him. Have you? If he is the person you live with and you are in love with and you two are in a relationship, should you not discuss these big moves with him? I personally believe that if you are looking to have a future together, you shouldn´t rush off trying to find a solution in Yedda first. From what I have read, you are trying to make up your mind already before the situation comes up. I´d suggest you talk to him. Hear him out on what he has to say about your wishes (going to Paris). If he does not support you or leaves you puzzled, Yedda should / could be the place to turn to for a final desicion.

Talk to him. Good luck.

Well said, Angelina.

Hi,
Between the white and the black there are many shades of grey (in fact many colours !).  It is NOT a case of either or !.   True love will survive anything !. 
Best regards,