I have been married for 25 yrs. We have not had ...

Susan,

    You have a very big problem.  He is impotent but does not want to take Viagra.  If sex is very important to you which I know it is, you need to see a urologist who will suggest other treatment of choice for impotence.  If your husband will refuse to remedy the situation, I think you should file for a divorce.

On the other hand, if you can live with your husband without having sex, stay in the marriage.  I know some people will advise you to use a vibrator.  For me a vibrator is not a good substitute for the real thing.

    If I was in your situation, I would file a divorce because he refuses to do something about the problem.

    You need to weigh things, the ultimate decision is yours and you have to be comfortable with it.

Take good care.

Hi, My friend Dogbreeder gave you an excellent answer (brave and true as she always does - gave her 2 thumbs up). I would like to add a comment. Sometimes a man thinks that if he has low libido his wife has low libido too... Is he aware that you want good healthy sex ?.... If he knows that you you do and responds in a very selfish way that's a big problem. Before filing for a divorce I would recommend on marriage counselling.... only if it fails than there is that option. Best regards.

oh sure, lots, lol. After all this time you just gotta find out what lights his light bulb, lol. taste change after a long time, i know we have been married 3 decades now. Maybe he has a new fetish he's afraid to share with you and it's causing him to stay away. Get him to tell you. Just tell him you are not afraid to try new things. Maybe role playing or laytex outfits or toys... try them all. You might not ever get out of the bedroom again, lol. Slap some handcuffs on him, lol. Maybe lit bondage does it for him, lol. You'll find it, lol. Just keep trying, you'll find the button thast lights up his life and when you do you'll mknow it. Good luck! :)