First of all, your boyfriend needs to get over his control issues. He's in no position to discourage you from taking medications that may help you get through this traumatic time.
The death of a loved one is extremely difficult, and it takes time to recover from that. Fears about weight gain are secondary to you healing and getting back on track.
You should immediately meet with your primary care doctor and let her or him know what's going on. If they prescribe medication to treat your depression, you NEED to take it. There is no way that you can be physically healthy or in shape if you can't pull yourself out of bed in the morning.
Fix the grief and depression first, and then you can start working on getting your physical fitness squared away.
Second, while weight gain is a possible side effect from certain anti-depressants, not everyone who takes them will gain weight. It depends on the meds, the person, and their activity levels. Some people never gain weight on them.
Your boyfriend needs to understand that your mental health is far more important than a few pounds on a scale.
Once you get the depression under control, read this article which will help you become more healthy physically and lose your belly fat:
Best of luck Meredith ....
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