your husband may not be allowing you to build any passion for him and that is something you may have to deal with. However, the first rule in my opinion is one that requires you to take focus of yourself. You are staring at all the problems and not looking for a solution. The thoughts that you are having suggest that you may have a slight chemical imbalance. This can be triggered by so many things, death of a loved one, child birth, menopause, just too many to list. Seek a local family practioner and talk candidly about your feelings of withdrawal and low sex drive and also your depression. This is so common with our stress levels and busy lifestyles. If you want to take a more holistic approach (natural correction) my advice is accept this one rule, Happiness comes from within. When you are happy your circumstances do not make you sad because a healty mind adapts well under pressure. Now, if you are wanting us all to patronize you, so be it, if you want help several people have suggested some great things. You posted, we responded now take a check up from the neck up and make some change happen. By the way, if you are a Christian you already know the deal about Divorce, it is not in the deck for you whether you have a child or not. A marriage is about a partnership, a close friendship. Get this into your marriage and the intimacy will be there when it needs to be. Your body type and his will not matter if you build the kind of bond that God intended for you both. You also did not mention past abuse before you were married but, this is common also and if this is something in your closet, it deserves to be dealt with by a professional. You may not think it is relevant but, I assure you it is. Tried covering all the basics but "action" is what is going to change your circumstance.