Family Crisis, Please Help!

What if anything should I do? The mother of my children took off with my kids to stay with her sister in another city after we seperated. For about a month we talked kinda resonably, but after we got into it one night about her comming back she revealed to me that she filed for child support. After this she stopped answering my calls and would not let me talk to them. After about a month and a half of this I decided to claim the kids on my tax return, this was the only way I could afford to hire an attorney to fight for my children(I did not want them relocated up there and did not want to be a weekend dad.) After she found out about this she became enraged. She had plans to move into a house with her sister. Soon after she found out I was taking her to court she decided to move in with a guy she just met(knew him for a few weeks.) Beside the fact that she is trying to hide out this is also a rebound relationship for her. Despite the fact that she is using the kids to hurt me and has a "new" boyfriend I still love her very much, I know that might seem even crazier. I did hurt her and cause the breakup in the first place. We have been together about 6 years and our kids are 3 and 1. She did the same thing before we had kids, I hurt her and she jumped right into a rebound. We talked during the 4 months she was with that guy and she eventually came back. She has also tried to keep my child from me before and I didnt take legal action I just let her have her way. I know I can just move on and live with whatever the courts determine, but I want my family back. I dont want to hurt her again ,(messing around) or take her for granted. Right now she is confused, and very emotional. I am hurting also. I know I could move on like most advise, but I want to be a family, for the kids and because I truly love her. What can I do and what should I be doing in the meantime.  

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43 thumbs up

You have brains in your head, feet in your shoes, you can steer yourself in any direction you choose. 

-Dr. Seuss 

I think you need to try to meet up with her to have a final conversation about this.  Tell her that you know you have hurt her, but that in your heart, all you want is for the family to be together.  Tell her that she can take time to think about it, but that you both at this point only have 2 choices... to go to court, divorce and see what the court decides with regard to the kids, or you guys can get together and try to fix this, even if it means that you need to see a therapist together or whatever.  Good luck.  I hope you guys can have this conversation and that it all works out for you. 


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