Ok, so we are back. Our trip was not as great as i wanted it to be. I did not follow through on "leaving it behind"... and I am so upset with myself for not doing so. I was under stress, first for trying to keep our two young ones happy and comfortable throughout the trip and then trying to keep my husband happy (we were with my family, not my parents but with my aunt and cousins) and at the same trying to keep myself looking good... I did get some really nice comments too which boosted my self esteem a bit, good to hear. We had some good days, but we had two huge fights... yes I got out of control, and in front of the children. I can not do this again... it is not healthy for us. Anyway, i was upset because of "her". They emailed each other every day, of course about work, but little tidbits about our trip were shared, where we were, how long we were staying, etc. Our last day was nice though, spent at a hotel, out for lunch on the boardwalk...more like a real vacation which was nice. We both agreed. So, that was our trip.
I blew up again 2 days ago... gosh I know he must be sick of me, but what triggered it was when I woke up in the morning to find him (and for most of the night) sleeping at the edge of the bed, literally with half his pillow on his nighttable, how do you think that made me feel... horrible. So i was miserable all day when we finally got into another huge arguement... he actually snapped at me first... I told him about the pillow thing... i told him that as you know I am highly sensitive these days so anything will set me off, I also told him that in a couple of months I'll look back at this and say how silly it all is, continued to tell him about why "she" has to email every day... All his emails thank her for everything she does, "thanks", "thanks yet again", etc. etc. and I told him so, and I told him I never hear a thanks from you... am I not more important... he said it is not only her .... it gives an encouragement to students, I said, well don't you think I need an encouragement??? Blah, blah blah....I have to leave it alone now. We've talked enough about it or maybe too much. A fresh start is needed. This is Day 2 of not mentioning her, and being happy me.... cause really I am a very happy energetic person....
Pinklove, I'm thinking of having a little party for his "teachers" in June, and have him invite everyone, including her. I know he'll say no, but I want to do this and I'll try and convince him.... What do you think? Anybody? Thanks again.
