Drug questions for a worried friend

In my opinion, a drug is a drug. Whether your ex is sprinkling cocaine onto a joint or snorting it, it is still cocaine. If it started with weed and now it's cocaine and poppers, then it sounds to me like he is definitely addicted to drugs and is already starting to look for the next high. I think that your ex needs some major help, but i don't know how much you can do for him alone. You might want to consider talking to his family. Maybe an intervention would be the best thing for him right now.

Misslissa, I have been on both sides of the position you are now in. I am 53yrs old and have been clean since 1999. I've been married 3 times, (twice during my addiction), and all my wives were, (and 2 still are), addicts. Most, if not all, of my friends and girl friends are addicts, (keep in mind that when I say addicted I'm not only referring to drugs but to alcohol as well. It is not only a drug, but by far the most damaging, life costing, drug there has ever been).

I'm telling you all this because I can't make it more clear that I have enough experience on the subject and its sub-categories like relationships, to tell you that I have never seen  relationship of any kind work when one person is abstinent and the other uses. It makes no difference if he's putting cocaine in his joint or if he's snorting it directly because the point is whatever he's told you that he's doing, he is actually doing a hell of a lot more than that. Anyone who has enough cocaine to waste it by sprinkling it on a marijuana cigarette is most certainly snorting it or smoking it in a number of different and far more effective ways.

I guess what I'm saying is that you just will not believe, nor are you prepared for, the kind of living hell you are about to go through for the next 15 to 20 years if you don't break it off with him NOW and get  away while you can! I don't have enough time to go into it, but you need to know that I'm telling you this not from some personal belief or opinion that taking drugs is wrong. I'm telling you this as one very psychologically battered person/recovering drug addict, to simply help another human being. Whether or not taking drugs is good or bad has nothing to do with my answer here.

Don't try to help him, or fix him, or understand him, or anything else you make think you can do for him. You cannot help him because only he can do that. And he's not even thinking about it and won't until he has fallen and hit the bottom of the Bottom. But you'd better believe me when I tell you that he isn't going down there alone if he can help it. He will take you or anyone who's foolish and naive enough to stay with him.

         Sorry if this is not what you were hoping to hear, (and I'm sure that it's not), but you'll maybe one day, see him again and he has taken the ride that we addicts all do, and he came out wiser and very much sober.

Addiction is a terrible problem to face, but there is another lesser-known problem that affects the people surrounding the addict: co-dependence.  The words you've chosen in your post ("although we aren't together I still feel obligated to make sure he is okay" and "I am probably the only person in his life who doesn't do drugs.") point to a dangerous co-dependence on your part that you need to know is there.  Photorich is right; your ex-boyfriend is going to do whatever he is going to do, and he may need to hit bottom to get through this.  But he is not your responsibility.  He is not a child and you are not his mother.  Please take care of yourself and focus on yourself and the things you need to succeed in life, not saving someone else.  Good luck.