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Dating,Love

Is dating multiple people dishonest, sleazy, and flat out wrong? Or is it healthy, even beneficial, to date multiple people at the same time in your quest of a soulmate?  This does not include being sexually intimate with your dates.


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Love is the battery of life....

Hi,
Excellent question.  I believe that dating multiple people at the same time is very healthy and beneficial, provided you do it open and clear (so your dates know about it).  It increases one's chances to meet the right person (yes, maybe even the soulmate).   It will be fair and honest to tell your dates, in a sensetive nice way, that you are dating others as well in an attempt to find the right person (and it says nothing about the current date).  Yes, some won't like it ("Am I in a competiotion ?") but the vast majority will appreciate your: honesty, fairness and your openess.
In fact most of those dates do exactly the same.....
Best regards,


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The road to nowhere is paved with good 'intentions'.

 

OronD has a healthy out look on dating. Personally I think dating more than one person at a time could get really complicated.. I say that because everyone you see will most likely have a great quality you love about them, or you wouldn't be seeing them in the first place right?  but you can't 'combine' all the guys! Eventually you'll have to choose, losing out something wonderful another guy had to offer you! Maybe even missing it!

And then I wonder how much of your undivided attention you could give to any of the relationships without getting distracted or pulled away by someone else with something more fun to do!   I tried to date only 2 different guys once, and ended up being crazy about both of them!!!  It was so hard on me, and them,  I made up my mind to never do that ever again!

By the way, there ended up being so much tention and grief .. I had to regretfully leave them both.  I know you're a smart Woman, but it can happen to the best of us!  I believe in one-at-a-time.


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"What does it profit a man to gain the world if he loses his soul?"

Interesting.  OronD gave a very good answer.  mrankens gave a very good answer with a different opinion.  How about if I weigh in with a third differing opinion?  After all, it's a yes or no question.

Let's look at your goals first.  You list multiple and possibly exclusive goals as: looking for a lifelong commitment and finding your soulmate.  We probably don't share the same views of what a soul is and how it relates to other souls, but maybe I can explain how you may have many soulmates. Souls do relate to other souls, but each soul is here for its own purpose.  This may include to spend a life together as a married couple, but quite often it doesn't.  Take the life of Edgar Allan Poe, the poet and writer.  When he was about eight or ten, he met his soulmate, Helen.  About a fourth of the poems he wrote were about her.  More than half of the love poems were about her.  She was a very old woman when they met, and died before Poe was a teenager.  This, to me, is a very beautiful thing.  Sad, but beautiful, and the joy they brought each other, how could you measure this?  This is one of many different ways soulmates can interact.  I believe they can play many parts that are important to our lives, and that we have more than one soulmate.  Each has a purpose in our life, and after we're all bodiless we can sit around and compare notes, if we have the need to.  I predict a lot of irony when the time comes.

  So, to me, odds are you've already met some of your soulmates, and will meet more in the future.  None of them may be your future husband, though you may get married and live happily ever after.  As far as getting married, OronD gave the best advice, if, as mrankens said, you can follow it without cracking up from the emotional pressure.  If you are looking for a soulmate to marry, I would say to quit dating or looking at all.  There is a reason for everything, and when the reason is right for you to meet him, you will.  And probably nothing in the world could keep the both of you from knowing you were meant for each other.  Just as nothing in the world could bring you two together before the reason is right.  You have to trust your soul on this one.  If it knows where love lies for you, it will point the direction for you to follow.  Whether you can understand where it leads you, or how it leads you, I can't guess.  

 


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One of the most painful circumstances of recent advances in science is that each one of them makes us know less than we thought we did. When I was young we all knew, or thought we knew, that a man consists of a soul and a body; that the body is in time and space, but the soul is in time only. Whether the soul survives death was a matter as to which opinions might differ, but that there is a soul was thought to be indubitable. As for the body, the plain man of course considered its existence self-evident, and so did the man of science, but the philosopher was apt to analyze it away after one fashion or another, reducing it usually to ideas in the mind of the man who had the body and anybody else who happened to notice him. The philosopher, however, was not taken seriously, and science remained comfortably materialistic, even in the hands of quite orthodox scientists.


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