Cheating Boyfriend

You could give him the benefit of the doubt. If he did come clean, and he seems to be telling the truth, and you actually believe he's grown up since that time, why not bestow your trust? Perhaps this is all he needs.

This is a "tweener".  Could go either way (i'm a guy).  Could be total BS or the truth.  Give him the benefit of the doubt, but don't be a fool or naive.  Get my drift??  Good luck!

yeah, i saw another question that asked, "once a cheater always a cheater."  not necessarily true!  one time i had a girlfriend, and i cheated on her (not so so seriously, but a definite cheating situation) -- and i would never ever do it again after that.  it was the most terrible guilt i have ever felt.  so, give him a chance!

The problem comes in when that is the way "the cheater" handles issues in the relationship and it becomes an engrained pattern. Some people have such lousy relationship skills that they start looking around for someone else to adore them rather than roll up their sleeves and give back in a relationship. It's easier for them to go start a new relationship with the new 'perfect' person, than to stop and take responsibility for things they may be doing to cause problems in the relationship. If there is a long history, watch out. If it's a really young person, there's hope that it could be a fluke, but usually a pattern of handling ones emotions and people becomes ingrained. They learned the wrong coping skills and until they take responsibility for that...well...there's nothing anyone else can do. Some people in this world take responsibility for EVERYTHING (co-dependents) and other people take responsibility for NOTHING (dependents, sociopaths, narcissists) Hopefully you can find a balanced person in between who is willing to work on things honestly.

No one is perfect, everyone is dishonest at some point during their lives, you just have to accept the fact that he messed up once, but in his defense it was in a non-serious relationship and he was young. I would believe that he is sincere in that he does not want to live like that anymore, however, you have to keep that fact in the back of your mind because although people can change, the early stages of their lives are the foundations for who they become alter on in life. Take his word and trust in it but know that if things seem odd ever, simply talk to him and let him know you are concerned. If I were you I would tell him that is how you feel about the situation, as well.

hey when you were in that "cheating" situation, did you tell your girlfriend???

It was kind of a strange situation, as a jealous ex-gf was the friend of the girl I cheated with, and so proceeded to call my gf - who she didn't know at all.  So, the girl found out, and being 16 years old at the time... I denied.  Denied.  Told half the truth really, that the girl came on to me strongly (which was true), and that I put the kibash on it right there (which was less than half true, but I did stop most of it before anything started).  I cheated, and then lied to the gf is the bottom line.  I felt shame then, and will forever.  So, not every cheater is a cheater for life!

Well, you have to give him a chance, but be careful of how he spends his time. It might be just once in a lifetime, or it could be how he treats girls in general. Just watch for any suspicous behavior that keeps coming up frequently and also how he spends his time. But, it could have been just a one time thing. Good luck