When I hit the 30 mark, I had a son, was single, unhappy, divorced, miserable, I didn't like myself and I was lost. I realized I did not like me, so how could anyone else like me? That was the day I made my life choice to change and it worked for me. I just kept thinking, who do I like and why, and would I want to be like that person? I came us with a "role model" and from that day forward, I tried to modify my life to emulate theirs as best I could. It worked really well. I got a job and actually found a job I liked after about 4 different tries, and I raised my son as best I could. I made it. I am 52 now, my son id almost 30. He just came to visit last night from his home, 900 miles away. He brought his girlfriend along to meet me. We are enjoying life. As far as confidence goes, I know a lot of druggies that are very confident theives. Confidence isn't always the answer. I think it's more of a desire to change. It takes a little time, you'll slip up, but set a goal and go for it. Good Luck!