“just be yourself”?

The phrase “be yourself” could easily be called the “universal” dating advice for men.

But what does this really mean?

What a woman wants is for you to be your REAL self… the person you are around your family and your buddies.

Here’s an example:

When you were a kid playing a game with friends and your mom would yell, “Come home for dinner”… of course you would say “I’m almost done with the game Mom… I’ll be there when I’m finished!”

But then when you grow up and an attractive woman says, “Go to the bar and get me a drink” and you say “Right away dear!”

Now let me ask you… is that “being yourself”?

No way. You’re trying to win her approval by doing what she wants.

This is how the average man acts around an attractive woman… and women see this “wussy” behavior as you trying to be someone you’re not…

So remember… YOUR REAL SELF IS NOT A WUSS! So stop acting like one. 

while asking this question you seemed to me of asked 2.

1. should i be different to attract women?

2. should i be different?

it is fair to say if you are happy with yourself then yes, don't put on a front just to get the girl, if you do this a. you will be unhappy in time and b. she will see through the front in time

but to me asking this question is more about "what is wrong" "should i change" and if this is the case look at yourself in greater detail, why do you react to certain situations in the way you do? and how can you change your thought process into more possitive ones.

it is natural for man to conform to the rest of the herd, we tend to feel if we act differently we are strange, this is of course a massive misconception.

my point to all this is, as soon as you feel confident in your identity and comfortable with who you are as a person, your confidence will not only attract the girl you want but many more.

why is it you sometimes see people you think ugly with stunning girls/men? pure confidence, and strong identity.

so get thinking, think positive and the negatives will melt away.

good luck buddy!!!

You have to find a Woman who is attracted to who you are and not what you think you should be.

Yourself: 

your normal, healthy, or sane condition or self <you haven't been yourself lately>

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va=yourself 

be yourself:

to behave in your usual manner, rather than behaving in a way you think other people might like:
"The best thing you can do is to go into the interview and just be yourself".

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/define.asp?key=92069&dict=CALD 

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantement, it is as perrenial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

http://www.phrases.org.uk/bulletin_board/6/messages/1112.html

I am assuming you have either (a) tried being yourself to dismal or epic failure, or (b) feel as if your current self is inadequate or lacking in the attractiveness department. I will be frank. If your current self sucks and is unattractive, then improve.

There is nothing wrong with being who you are, but if you are actively pursuing a meaningful relationship with another person, why not improve your relationship with your self as well? If you're not feeling like a catch, then you need to get your feelings in order and resolve to do something about it.

• Haircut got you down? Obvious solution
• Physical shape got you down? Obvious solution
• Lack of friends? Feeling empty? Wanting that indescribable "more" out of life? Well, that's a deeper problem with more implications I care to explore...

Point is, regardless of whether or not you're attractive, as you are, to other people right now, it won't matter much if you don't feel the same way. It'll either color your good interactions with negativity ("they're doing it out of pity or teasing me") or merely destroy them from ever happening due to self-fulfilling prophecy ("No one will like me, so why bother being social and cheery to these brainless sheeple?").

So to be attractive by being yourself you need to know, not act or think, that you have something to offer... and that something is something people will want. In order to know that though, you need to be honest with yourself. You may not be or feel like a catch right now, but everyone has strengths or redeeming qualities that makes them them. At the same time, we have things that hurt us and things that we should address. However, even addressing your demons and strengthening what you got won't help nearly as much if you can't understand people and what simply attracts people to others. Especially, what you can/already do that's attractive to people in general. That's... a tad more complicated. You research that on your own.

To attract women, you can do the puss n boots method (i.e., fake it until you make it) by subscribing to the seduction arts and lurking its communities. But it's better to do a combination of everything and work on that and all other aspects of your life too. Don't wanna be some of those guys written about in the Game do you? Read that book btw. The order and aspects, as well as the amount of time you devote to them, should be up to you in the order of importance you feel deserves your focus.

A caveat though: Merely being an attractive person will not guarantee attraction from your would be mates. If you're a goofball, a sleeze, a wannabe-player, a wuss, or hyperventilate around women (or whatever weirdo/creepo qualities you can think of), then you have a problem. On the other spectrum, being nice and interesting is pointless unless you properly convey sexual interest via flirting and stuff. If you can't/won't do that, enjoy your many hot "friends," lol. But that dynamic and various approaches in western culture is another issue entirely... regardless, good luck!

Well, it'll pop-out sooner or later won't it?

And I'm mentioning it for your sake not for hers.